


Losing My Breath

by the_black_rose



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, F/M, Fanart, Flirting, Fluff and Humor, Friends to Lovers, Marines, Podfic Welcome, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romantic Comedy, Sexual Tension, Vague reference to attempted date rape, Weight training, gundam fanart
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:15:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 20,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27562900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_black_rose/pseuds/the_black_rose
Summary: AU. Heero POV. A new girl moves into his apartment complex - helping a combat veteran express the words and experience the crucial moments that matter.“You’re going to be my friend, now, aren’t you?” Heero turned and headed towards the coffee maker.Relena grinned. “You could try to escape, but I'm pretty determined.”
Relationships: Relena Peacecraft & Heero Yuy, Relena Peacecraft/Heero Yuy
Comments: 88
Kudos: 117
Collections: Bringin' Gundam Wing Back, November 1xR Fixing Things Challenge!





	1. She began with a day of rain

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Love Reflection Discord server November (lemon) writing prompt. I was super excited that this one kinda whooshed out inside of a week. And then the end/epilogue decided to put a different slant on things. So, for the most part, this is a finished story, but someone (not naming names, but rhymes with Zero Muy) keeps adding scenes to it. Mostly lemon-y ones, but, some angst as well.
> 
> I hope you'll enjoy. Thanks so much to those who will read it. 
> 
> Love,  
> ~Rose

* * *

**Chapter 1 - She began with a day of rain**

“First” - The first time Heero noticed her:

Rain drenched her hair and stuck her pale pink blouse to her skin - in all the right places. Translucent fabric clung to her ample chest; she looked fresh-faced, and, Heero grinned, ‘A little cold.’ She walked into the apartment building, carrying a pocketbook in one hand and a backpack slung over one shoulder.

He leaned onto the black iron railing on the second floor overlooking the lobby of the downtown apartment complex. Its bare, “urban chic” decor designed to attract young professionals, the place advertised itself as being: “uptown in the midst of downtown”. But it was really cheaply constructed and on the edge of the ‘good area’ of town. He lived there because, being a former Marine, he didn’t fear the criminal element. He got a decent-sized apartment for the price, and an easy commute to sporting events, the airport, and public transportation. 

The population changed every six months as life situations or jobs changed. This girl appeared to be new; sopping wet, she left a trail of water on the etched concrete leading to the bank of elevators.

She stepped out into the second floor hallway. His apartment sat along the last row of residences; a single apartment was situated across from his. They were the only two located to the right of the elevator on the northeast side of the building. He watched her glance one way, and then the other, before starting towards his end of the floor. He raised an eyebrow as she stepped past him without a look, then stopped at the door just across the hall, took out a set of keys from her pocketbook, and promptly dropped them on the floor.

Before he could register the thought, Heero found himself picking them up. She turned and looked at him - bright, aqua-blue eyes met his gaze and then quickly glanced away. “Thank you,” she said in a soft voice.

Heero nodded and turned to open his own door. Just before he shut it, he heard her call out: “Oh, you’re my neighbor?”

Heero turned around. The lace of her bra peeked through the soaked material of her shirt. Water dripped from her hair down her cheeks and looked like tears. “No. You’re  my neighbor.”

“Oh, ‘cause you,” her lips pursed together and one hand went to her hip. “Ha ha.” She wiped her hand on her shirt, as if that would make it any less wet. She extended it in his direction. “My name is Relena Darlian.”

“Hn.” He nodded and turned to shut his door. 

“And you are?” Her voice called out after him.

"Your neighbor." He peered at her through the wedge-shaped opening in the door. “Buy an umbrella.” He shut the door.

\-----------------------

The second time he noticed her:

Impossibly long legs stretched for what looked like miles in short, loose running shorts; the legs and their owner caught his attention on the treadmill beside him. The same girl: Relena Darlian, his new neighbor, wore a dark colored workout bra with a long, sheer shirt that showed off her slim figure as she jogged. 

Heero finished the sprint on his HIIT program, and scaled back the pace to a walk. She continued her jog; her lean arms pumping as her chest rose and fell. Her torso pivoted in time with her steps. 

They finished at about the same time; she stepped off the end of her treadmill right into his path. She stopped short and turned to look up at him, the skin at the side of her eyes forming tiny wrinkles as her lips curved into a smile. She met his gaze and the smile fell. “Sorry,” she scowled then looked away.

Point taken; he probably could have been nicer to her. He stepped around her and over to the large, mirrored expanse of dull, grey carpeted flooring; the section of his apartment fitness center had been designed for weight training. Multiple stacks of dumbbells were stationed along the wall; a set of floor mats hung from pegs. A couple of adjustable benches sat vacant, but available to all apartment residents. As Heero moved to the weight room, his neighbor followed behind. 

He stopped next to the first dumbbell rack and turned around. She stood a few feet away. 

“You’re following me.”

She rolled her eyes. “I happen to work out every Tuesday and Thursday at this time. But this is the first time I’ve seen  you  here.” She pointed at him with her water bottle. 

Heero grabbed the bottle, uncapped it and took a nice, long drink. “Thanks,” he said and handed it back.

She glared up at him. “Are you this big of a jerk to everyone here, or do I get some extra special treatment for living across the hall from you?”

He chuckled. The frown on her face wasn’t even close to cross. She was clearly too good natured for her own sake, and - if  their interactions were any indication - she was also too naive. With a sigh, he noted he was going to have to keep an eye on her; trouble was bound to find her one of these days.

Relena stepped over to the next stack of weights, and grabbed a pair of fifteen pound dumbbells off the rack. She hefted one weight up to her shoulder, turning the grip as she went; then she slung the other dumbbell - engaging back muscles and using momentum to help propel the heavy weight.

Heero shook his head, and crossed his arms over his chest. “Your form is wrong.” She met his gaze in the mirror. A hard-ass Marine stared back; his dark brown hair had returned to its former, pre-military style. Pieces fell down over his forehead in sweaty peaks. Fluorescent light reflected off the perspiration on the exposed skin of his broad shoulders; his army green tank top fell loose over his waist. The mirror pointed out that her light blue-green eyes appeared several shades lighter than his dark blue ones.

“You’re slinging the dumbbell and not getting the full benefit of the effort. You should lower the weight and go slower.” 

He could see her brain process the information. Her first instinct, the stubborn side of her, stuck out her chin and glared at his reflection. But, she put the dumbbell back on the rack - with a huff. Then, she repeated the hammer curl movement with the lower weight.

His fingers met her shoulder, then slid down to her elbow, moving her arm so it was aligned with her shoulder. He fit one palm against the back of her hand; the other held onto her elbow. Heero helped her raise the weight.

“1 one thousand, 2 one thousand, 3 one thousand.” The dumbbell tapped her shoulder. “Now, down in one, fluid movement.”

He helped her repeat it once more before letting go; he watched her perform six more reps, then switch hands. She met his gaze as she executed the same movement - working the other bicep. He gave her a slight nod and his reflection added an even smaller smile.

After finishing her sixteen reps, she tilted her mouth up on one side. “Thanks, Umbrella-guy.”

‘Umbrella? Oh.’ He shrugged. “I gave you good advice.”

“True. But most people would have started with introducing themselves.”

He crossed his arms against his chest and ducked his head to look her in the eye. “I’m not most people. And you should be more cautious with your personal information.” Heero leaned closer, and couldn’t help but notice she had a couple of freckles on her nose; her aqua-colored eyes held several small gold flecks in their depths. The fact that she was this beautiful close-up and without makeup - she needed to be more careful, not less.

“You don’t know me. I could be a stalker. Or a killer. And you tell me your name first thing - a young woman living alone, no less.”

Her eyebrows rose and she straightened. 

“And, now, I know exactly where you’ll be at this time on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Didn’t your parents teach you to think?”

That’s when he got the rest of her water bottle dumped on him. Icy liquid splashed his face like a cold slap of her hand. He blinked, water dripping down the sides of his face. She strode towards the exit; before she reached the door, she paused, turned her head:

“Buy an umbrella.” She tossed the words over her shoulder, opened the door and walked away.

\-----------------------

The third time Heero noticed her:

A tall guy with a muscular build, sleeve tattoo and a long, scraggly beard followed her into the building at a late hour on Saturday night. Relena walked, hunched forward and staring at the floor; she stumbled a step, caught herself and took a few rapid stutter steps. Then, she slowed, drawing out her gait; her hands reached for the wall and stabbed the button for the elevator. She leaned forward, bowing her head. Her ribcage visibly expanded and contracted.

The rough-looking guy kept going towards the stairs. Concrete walls echoed with his heavy footsteps. Heero watched from the hallway as Mr. Gnarly Beard emerged from the stairway, turned the corner and headed towards him. He stopped a few feet down the hall, leaned against the railing and waited.

Relena hummed as she moved. Still focused on the ground, she didn’t appear to notice Mr. Gnarly Beard or that he started moving again after she passed him.

Heero stepped out of the hall; he opened the door to his residence and retrieved the Sig Sauer Model P320 RX he kept in the drawer of a small entryway table. Shoving it into his waistband, he pulled his jacket close to cover it. 

Before she reached her door, Heero tugged her into his apartment and shut her inside. He stood in the corridor.

About a half a minute ticked by; the thug stopped, glanced around then turned and stopped short. He looked at Heero.

“Get lost. Now. And don’t come back.”

Black, deep set eyes darted one direction and then back. “What’re you gonna do about it?”

“Could call the cops.” Heero shrugged and widened his stance. “Or maybe I’ll use you for target practice.” He pulled the side of his jacket enough to show the gun handle above his waistband. “I wonder who will miss you.”

The man growled but walked away. Heero waited until the thug exited the building before turning the knob to go back inside his apartment.

She stood with her back against his kitchen counter: arms crossed, face pale; some heavy makeup around the eyes (for her) gave her an older, smoky look. Her skirt barely passed mid-thigh, and she wobbled a bit on her heels when she took a step towards him. The smell of alcohol explained why. “Is he-” She trembled when she grabbed his arm. “Is he gone?” 

Heero sighed. “Yeah. But, take my room. I’ll sleep on the couch.” He brushed a tear from her cheek. “You’ll be safe here.”

\-----------------------

The next morning, he awoke to the sound of running water. Dishes clinked and clacked. Something clattered. Hard. Cabinet doors unsticking; opening, closing. Shuffling. The smell of coffee. 

He lifted his head from the couch pillow and spied the blonde princess - because she acted like a princess - in his kitchen. Washing dishes?

“What are you doing?” Sleep garbled the sound of his voice; he cleared his throat.

Her head peeked around the cabinet; the overdone makeup gone, she looked her usual self. A certain part of his body noted that it liked hearing her voice, and seeing her face - even early on a Sunday morning.

“Saying thank you.”

“You said it already. You don’t need to do,” he waved a hand in her direction, “that.”

“You saved my life last night. Seems like I could do something a little nice for you.”

He stretched and stared up at the ceiling - waiting for his ‘morning situation’ to subside. “I’m pretty sure you hate me.” 

“Well. Maybe we could start over.”

Heero sighed and sat up. He bunched the blanket over his lap and sent a last plea to that part of his body: ‘There will hopefully be a time. For that. For her. Just, not today.’ 

It finally relented. When she returned her attention to the dishes, he took the opportunity to stand, grabbing his jeans from the floor. “You’re going to be my friend, now, aren’t you?” Heero pulled his jeans up over his legs; he turned his back towards her as he fastened his pants. Semi-dressed, again, in a t-shirt and jeans - he turned around and headed towards the coffee.

“You could try to escape, but I'm pretty determined.” She grinned up at him as he approached. “So, why don’t we try this again. I’m Relena Darlian,” she said and held out her hand.

Heero looked at it and then up at her. He didn’t want to be her friend. He wanted to have her sleep in his bed, again. Naked and soft and completely out of breath.

“If you don’t tell me your name, I’m going to call you Umbrella-Boy in a loud voice in public places.”

“Heero Yuy,” he said and took her hand. She blushed, but held his gaze and smiled.

‘Hm. She’s got a good poker face, but I’m not actually in the friend zone.’ He couldn’t keep his lips from turning up into a small grin.

Which she clearly mistook for something else.

“It’s nice to meet you, too, Heero.”


	2. Determined

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Reference to cooking meat contained. If you are a vegan or cooking meat offends you, please be aware that there are very overt references to this activity in the last (3rd) scene of this chapter.

* * *

"Determined" - That was a word for her.

Whether out of sheer spite or something else, Relena continued her Tuesday and Thursday morning workout routine.

The following Tuesday after her Saturday evening out, Heero helped her achieve the proper form on static lunges. Proving, once again, that she was far too trusting, she let her new 'friend' help her align her hip and knee…. And then admire those long, graceful legs - shined with perspiration.

"Are you a trainer?" She asked him just before he stole her water bottle again. He took a sip and shrugged.

"Now, you ask me? What if I'm on the list of registered sex offenders?" He handed back the bottle. She took it with narrowed eyes. 

"Then I guess I'd get to try out my self-defense classes. I'm studying Krav Maga. The first move is always a groin strike." She started for the door, taking those shapely legs with her. 

'Touché.' He grimaced and went after her. "I'm not a trainer. Just spent a lot of time working out."

"Misspent youth, clearly." She held the door open from just outside the fitness center. 

"My application to princess school was rejected." Heero exited the building and fell into step alongside her. "Working out was how I coped."

Sunlight peeked out from behind striped clouds and lit the early morning sky. Autumn weather chilled the perspiration on his skin. Soft dirt and mud turned the once white concrete sidewalk a dingy grayish brown. Small channels ran the length of the walk - the telltale sign of a professional lawn edger. A quiet breeze rustled leaves on nearby trees. The air smelled crisp this time of day - before traffic towed its smog into the city.

"Such a shame." The woman beside him glanced up at him out of the corner of her eye.

"What is?"

"That you didn't go to princess school. Could have learned some manners." Her blue-green eyes sparked in the sunlight. And her mouth….

"Overrated. Inefficient. And I look terrible in a tiara." He grabbed her water bottle and took another drink. Because he could. 

She huffed and rolled her eyes. "I guess Prince Charming school was all full up on handsome jerks." 

Heero handed the bottle back to her, and felt his mouth stretch into a grin. "No, I got in." He held open the door to the apartment lobby, and motioned for her to go first. 

"Did you? I doubt it." 

They walked the short distance from the entryway to the elevators. She turned left at the wall and entered the stairwell adjacent to the elevator bank. He took a longer stride to fall back into step with her. "Flunked out," he said as they started up the stairs.

"Well, no wonder you couldn't get into princess school."

"As long as you got in, the world will continue to turn."

"Cause I'm such a princess."

"Yeah. You are." He opened the door at the top of the stairs and, again, let her go first. 

They emerged a short distance from the entrances to their facing apartments. She walked to the end of the wall, where one hallway intersected with another. The second corridor led to their respective residences.

Relena paused and stood in the center of the hall. Her complexion flushed from their morning workout. Her smart mouth curved up on both sides as one, thin, blond eyebrow arched higher than the other. He definitely needed to watch her - over her. He took a deep breath and counted as he let it out.

She opened the door to her apartment with her back. He felt the strange urge to thank her for her company, but remained silent. 

She tilted her head and met his gaze. "Well, thanks for the workout tips," Relena said with a shrug and closed the door.

* * *

Thursday, Relena must have arrived a few minutes before him. When he entered the gym, she yelled: "Think fast!" A water bottle flew at his face.

Heero caught it.

"Nice reflexes."

His heart raced like he'd been sprinting on the treadmill. Heero swallowed, took a deep breath and counted to five. The water bottle contorted in his hand, he growled at her: "You don't do that to someone who's seen combat, Relena." 

He couldn't stop it; his senses heightened to the point of hyper awareness. The television playing in a low volume behind him grated on his eardrums; the sound of a treadmill in use - sharpened from a low hum to an annoying whine.

The muscles in his neck and shoulders hardened.

"Combat? Oh. Y-you didn't say," she came back into focus. Her eyebrows pinched together into a frown.

He crossed his arms and turned away. Heero closed his eyes and worked through 'finding his breath'. He drew in air, but couldn't hold it. His lungs contracted too quickly.

"You didn't say that. You haven't really said anything. About who you are."

"I'm not like you."

"I know." Her voice sounded soft. He opened his eyes and caught a glimpse of her reflection; Relena's hand hovered near his shoulder for a moment before dropping back to her side.

"Anyway. Enjoy the water." She walked over and grabbed a floor mat from the pegs on the wall - instead of heading to the treadmills. With him.

She knelt down on all fours and extended her right arm and left leg at the same time - exercises he recognized as flexibility work. Heero closed his eyes and tried again. He started by willing his heart to slow down. He had learned to master that ability in the Marines; slow, deep breaths. Focus on the internal sound of his heart beating. Slow. Slow. Watch. Breathe. Listen for the enemy.

But there was no enemy. Not anymore. He opened his eyes; Relena switched to bicycle crunches. Lying on her back, those long legs pedaled in slow, graceful turns. Her blonde ponytail pooled on the mat behind her. 

A part of him considered what it would be like, to just dig his fingers into her hair. And watch it slip against his hands. For hours....

His shoulders released. His heartbeat and breathing steadied. If only the 'cure' for his "PTSD" (whatever, every soldier had issues) could be watching her workout - he might have taken the VA doctors up on their offer.

Heaving a deep breath, Heero straightened his crumpled water bottle, broke the seal and took a sip. He threw a last glance at his 'friend', then moved to the treadmill to start his high-intensity interval training.

* * *

Friday evening, a knock on Heero's door interrupted his 'lite reading' - cyber intelligence reports he'd received from one of his analysts in Bahrain. 

He opened the panel to see Relena - armed with a couple of brown paper grocery sacks and her winning smile. He released the door and stepped back. She let herself in; Heero grabbed the bags of groceries from her and followed her inside.

"You look like a steak and potatoes guy," she said and moved to the sink; she began washing her hands.

"I'm vegan." He set down the grocery bags and leaned back against the cabinets - enjoying the view. Relena wore a pair of short jean shorts and a purple, long-sleeved t-shirt. As she bent over his sink, her rear rounded above nicely toned hamstrings.

"You're a lousy liar." She tossed the words over her shoulder.

"Didn't your apartment come with a kitchen?"

"It did," she grabbed a paper towel to wipe her hands, and turned to face him. "But, I thought it would be nicer to have dinner together."

He ran a hand through his hair. This woman - cooking dinner. For him? He checked his pulse; no, he hadn't died. But, he considered promoting her from princess to angel, anyway. "Make what you want."

She grinned, and retrieved a dark amber bottle with a swing top stopper. "Beer?" She held it out to him.

He narrowed his eyes. "What kind?"

"Craft specialty. IPA. Very hoppy."

"Hn. I'll try it. But, I don't drink alone."

"Good thing I brought a nice lager." She pulled a six pack of beer from one of the grocery sacks. "I can't stand IPA, but it seemed like it would suit you."

'You're starting to seem like you'd suit me.'

He popped open his bottle and headed back into the den to finish reading the report. Pans sang and the burner clicked and then lit. The shtuck! sound of his refrigerator door opening. Followed by the light thunk of glass against plastic when it shut. The metallic creak of his oven door… Heero put away the report, took another sip of his beer, and moved to the kitchen table to watch her.

Relena stood in his galley-style kitchen; the fluorescent light tangling in the long, gold pieces of her hair. It was the first time he'd seen it down, and dry. Her fingers curled a few strands behind one ear. 

The IPA tasted cold, not quite icy like he preferred. But the combination of bitter hops with the sweet, clean malt left a pleasant taste in his mouth. She finished cutting something green - which was neither steak nor potato.

"How'd you know what kind of beer I like?"

"Well. I just picked something I'd probably hate," she said as she opened a container of cream cheese, "and figured you would like it."

"So, you hate steak and potatoes?"

"No, that was just the method for beer. Steak and potatoes was a guess based on the military revelation." 

Heero nodded and fidgeted with the stopper attached to the bottle.

"What branch?"

"Classified."

She held the knob on his gas stove, clicking it so it would light. "Are you being a jerk right now?"

"Only a little. Doesn't seem to deter you, though."

She made a face at him, and he could picture her, as a child princess - sticking her tongue out at a playmate in her princess castle. 

"Not yet."

"Marines." He straightened his shoulders. "MARSOC." He wasn't sure whether princesses knew that meant Special Forces, so he added: "Can't say more than that."

Both her eyebrows rose. She blinked then leaned over the sink to wash her hands, again. "And now you do, fill in the blank?" She wiped her hands on his only dish towel. "For a living?"

"Babysit my neighbor."

She turned to look at him. One hand on that hip, again. "Now, you're being a jerk."

"Only a little." Heero grinned around the rim of his IPA. "Still doesn't seem to deter you."

She rolled her eyes and went back to work. The smell of bacon reached his nose about the same time as the pop! and sizzle hit his ears. His stomach growled. 

"I could take my steak, potatoes and yummy IPA and go home." She spoke to the bacon and green things as she stirred them in the pan.

"Only if you plan to let me move in."

Relena laughed. It sounded light and airy - like sunshine parting clouds of rain. She removed the pan from the burner and scooped the bacony-green things onto a plate. 

That grin…. He could picture her face: it'd be a softer smile on her lips when he laid her down on his bed and settled over her. 

She placed a small plate of bacon wrapped jalapeños in front of him. The tantalizing smell wafted closer. His stomach groaned, and his mouth watered. 

"You going to have some?" He wanted to be polite, to wait for her; but, his stomach poked a sharp stick into his gut and demanded food. 

"Mmm-hmmm, but still cooking. Go ahead and eat." She moved back to the counter. "Just save me one."

"Just one?"

"I brought, hopefully, enough food."

She pulled two steaks on white styrofoam rectangles from a grocery bag, and set about unwrapping them. Heero bit into a bacon wrapped jalapeño and chewed. The combination of flavors tasted spicy and savory. Easily the best thing he'd eaten all week (which had been a lot of protein shakes and grilled chicken. Hamburger patties. Several hardboiled eggs).

The crack and whir of a pepper grinder caught his attention. She ground a portion of pepper over each slab of meat and rubbed it in. A dash of oil. Heero bit into another jalapeño.

"Not that I'm picky, but how are you making the steak and potatoes?"

"I sear the steak on each side then bake it; the potatoes, I'm cheating. I bought deli-made au gratin potatoes and just have to heat them up."

Heero nodded. 

"I assume you eat your steak medium rare?"

"Sure. You like yours well done?"

She shook her head. "No. Medium to medium rare." Relena placed one of the hunks of meat in the sauté pan. The heady smell of a favorite meal twisted his stomach.

"If it wasn't for the jalapeños, I might take mine blue."

"Ick," Relena grimaced. "I didn't realize you were starving." She moved the steaks to a baking pan and bent down to place them in the oven.

"I didn't either." He admired the way her legs looked in those shorts and platform sandals. Her quadricep muscles flexed above her knee; her calf held a light ridge behind her tibia.

'Not until you showed up.'

"It shouldn't take too long." She moved the length of his kitchen - towards him. Those long, lightly tanned legs stepped close enough to invade his personal space; she helped herself to one of the jalapeños. 

He caught a whiff of a syrupy floral perfume; not too heavy, but sweet and rich. Heero fought the urge to just wrap his arm around her waist and pull her into his lap.

Relena moved back to the counter near the stove; she leaned against it and bit into the appetizer. A hand waved at her mouth. "Hot." She took a swig from her beer.

'How un-princess like.' Heero smiled. He relaxed into his chair. And tried to wait, patiently, for dinner to be ready.

As she ate, Relena's eyes flitted around his apartment. It shouldn't have been too different from hers - aside from the floorplan. Wood planked flooring in the entryway and living room gave way to a basic white tile in the kitchen. The living room and dining room were all one large area; Heero had removed the (useless) dining room fixture and replaced it with a fan. 

His sofa faced a 42 inch monitor mounted on the front wall of his apartment - to the left of the door. A square support post separated the dining-room-turned-den from the entryway; the kitchen table sat on the other side of the door - next to the refrigerator. 

The floorplan situated his living room further into the apartment; Heero separated the larger room from the 'den' with a couch facing the opposite direction. A television, receiver and center channel perched on a metal console (above several media appliances and his gaming system); the technology center blocked the view of a stone cobbled fireplace.

Relena's eyes came to rest on him. "So, why no girlfriend?"

His heart thudded outside of its usual rhythm. "Who says I don't have a girlfriend?"

"Well, this is definitely a bachelor's place. With your gaming equipment left out in the middle of the living room." She waved a hand at the headset and game controller discarded atop the coffee table. "And it's Friday night." She sipped again at her lesser lager. "Date night. But, I found you alone in your apartment."

"And here I thought I'd never get to meet the great Sherlock Holmes."

She leaned forward over the kitchen bar; the v-cut blouse revealed the tops of her breasts. "Quite frankly, my dear Watson, if you had a girlfriend, you wouldn't have one, now."

He swallowed the urge to grin. "Oh?"

"Because if you were my boyfriend and you let some other woman in your apartment to cook for you…." She shrugged her shoulders and her mouth crooked up on one side.

"By that definition, wouldn't a woman cooking dinner for a man in his apartment on a Friday night - seem like a girlfriend?"

She huffed. "Maybe." Relena met his gaze and one eyebrow rose. "If the guy in question was a little less of a jerk. Sometimes." She took another sip of her beer. 

He held her gaze. "I'll let him know."


	3. Jealous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which the prompt finally appears: "I don't know what he's fixing, but mine just broke".
> 
> Thanks so so much to all those who will read it!!!  
> Much love,  
> ~Rose

* * *

Losing My Breath

Chapter 3

"Jealous." That was a word for him.

Monday, during the dark hours of morning, a client called with a priority request. Heero and his cybersecurity team found themselves working shifts around the clock. It took time to acquire specialty foreign intel, even with the former-Marine-turned-entrepreneur's connections.

Tuesday morning, Relena texted him - asking if he could take a look at her car. Heero responded that he was too busy. But, in between calls and emails, he started contemplating what might be wrong with her vehicle. And what could happen to her: 

Relena could get stranded. Run off the road. The brakes could fail.

By late afternoon, he called in a quick favor from a friend.

"Peacemillion Auto. What can I do for ya?" A familiar voice answered above a buzzing sound. Something clanged! Heero winced. 

"I could use a favor."

"Ha." Fingers snapped and the obnoxious background noise quieted. "See, you sound like this guy I know? A real pain in my ass."

Heero rubbed a hand over his forehead.

"But, I know you're not him, because he never asks for favors."

Heero rolled his eyes. "I'm asking, now," he said with a sigh.

"Well, ya know I owe you one." His friend's gravelly voice pitched lower. "Just don't tell me you need a kidney, or some shit. I like both of mine right where they are."

"Some friend."

"Hey! It's not a kidney, is it?"

"No, I need you to come by and check out my neighbor's car." Heero crossed one arm over his chest. His encrypted mail program dinged with a new message. He placed his phone down, set it on 'speaker' and turned most of his attention back to his work. "Think you can handle it?"

A loud chuckle sounded through the phone. "Gee, when ya ask for favors, you really go all out on the flattery. Don't ya?"

"Hn."

"Yeah, all right. I'll swing by tomorrow." 

'Thanks.' The word stuck to his tongue and wouldn't come out.

"But feel privileged, cause I don't do house calls for just anyone, you know."

"Got it." 

Heero refocused on the email. The dark web report on his new neighbor - a personal project he commissioned from his cyber analysts - amounted to just a few paragraphs.

"You're wel—"

Heero terminated the connection. 

  * Current Employer: Zero-One Communications.
  * Current Position: Public Relations Analyst.
  * Marital Status: Single.
  * College: Weyridge University.
  * High School: Saint Gabriel Private Academy.
  * Middle School: Krushrenada Junior High.
  * Elementary: Catalonia Elementary.
  * Parents: (adopted) Twelv Darlian, deceased; (adopted) Marlene Darlian, living.
  * Adoption status: Closed.



'A mostly boring report.' He sent a note back to the analyst: "See what you can find out about the adoption."

Heero tapped on the edge of his laptop. 'I wonder how much she knows about it.'

…

He texted Relena later that evening: "A friend will stop by tomorrow to take a look at your car. After work." 

A few minutes ticked by before his phone buzzed with a response: "Thank you!"

"You're welcome, Princess."

He ran a hand over his face and glanced at the time. Another twelve hour workday. Some days, it really sucked being 'the boss'. Heero closed his laptop; he needed to sleep, now, so he could be awake when Europe came back online - in a few hours. 

The air in his apartment held a fresh chill. A faint, burning smell caught his attention as the furnace kicked on for the first time this season.

His cell phone vibrated. "Goodnight, Umbrella-boy."

Heero grumbled and texted back: "That's Prince Charming to you." He stood and stretched. The former Marine held the phone and made his way from the den to his bedroom - before flopping on the bed.

"Nope! You flunked out. No wonder you ended up a Marine." Her message ended with a winking emoji. 

Hm. She should just come over so he could kiss that smirk off her face. And then do…other things. He sighed and pushed the thought from his head - for at least a good minute or two. "Thanks for making me dinner the other night. Make sure your door's locked."

Heero laid down in his bed. Flannel sheets felt soft against his skin - and held in heat during this time of the year. But the grey plaid appeared threadbare in places. 

He plugged his phone in to charge and laid it on his nightstand. Sleep weighted his eyelids like a forty-five-pound rucksack. 

His phone buzzed. Heero picked it up to read the message from his princess: "You're welcome. Couldn't let you starve. Good night, Heero."

He placed the phone down and settled into his pillow. A last thought marched with heavy legs through his brain: 'I should get nicer sheets if I'm going to invite a princess to….'

* * *

The next day:

Heero forced himself to put down his work and step away from his computer for a moment. He checked his watch and decided to go downstairs - to check in on Relena, her car and his 'buddy'. 

Relena had mentioned having a friend of her own stop by. He'd caught a glimpse of her in the hall: a petite young woman with a short mop of dark brown hair and a spirited smile.

Heero didn't know what he intended to do. His friend, an old military buddy, was a mechanical wiz; opened his own shop when he got out of the Marine Corps. Specialized in muscle car restorations - or so Heero was told when his buddy showed up for a 'house call' on an ordinary Honda Civic ("with a sport package", his princess said). 

The two were bound to get along. His friend more than capable of helping out. Relena just as capable of communicating the car's issues. Heero just wanted to...check in. 

Her electric blue car sat in the mostly vacant parking lot on the back side of the apartment complex. A couple of bright work lights stationed on either end of the vehicle lit the area almost like broad daylight. 

Heero took the rear stairs and exited behind the building. A long, rectangular overhang jutted out - spanning the distance from the apartment entrance to the parking lot.

At the end of the covered walk, two girls sat on the curb. Relena leaned back against a metal post holding up the overhang; her long legs covered in jeans that ended at the top of what women considered 'boots'. With heels. Sunglasses sat, perched on top of her head - no longer useful in the early night sky. She wore a light jacket and her hair pulled up into a ponytail. 

Relena's friend sat a few feet away; a gas station coffee cup balanced on her leg. Heero made his way towards them, intending to do the civilized thing and talk to the girls. He drew up short at the sound of a giggle. 

Relena's friend spoke: "I don't know what he's fixing, but mine just broke."

His princess laughed. "I can't believe he's shirtless in this weather. I mean, he's been really nice. I'm thankful he could help." Relena pulled the zipper on her jacket and stuffed her hands in her pockets. "Heero's been so busy at work the past few days."

"Forget your neighbor! That can't be a good idea," the other girl said and pointed at Relena with the cup of coffee. "And seriously. That guy," she hooked a thumb at the former Marine wearing black jeans, combat boots and nothing else, "is a fine specimen of man." She sipped her coffee and shot Relena a wide grin. 

His princess shook her head. "Hilde!"

"What? Look at him. Just look! At that perfectly sculpted musculature. I'm digging the black tactical jeans and combat boots. And that religious-death themed tattoo." She bit her lip and raised her eyebrows. Hilde looked like a little girl pleading with her mom to let her bring home a stray puppy. 

Which, when talking about Duo Maxwell, was a fair comparison. If the puppy was a mongrel….

"I mean. I'm not complaining about the view. But, what's with the braid?" Relena shrugged her shoulders. "Isn't that odd for a Marine?"

"If you're not interested," Hilde trailed off. Her lips parted and formed something like an 'oh'.

Heero glanced up in time to see Duo pull his 'stretch and flex move'; the one he used to brag could charm any woman. Heero rolled his eyes, but had to admit - it did seem to have the desired effect on the two girls.

"What was I saying?" Hilde said with a sigh. "Oh. Yeah. If you're not interested in that guy? First, you should have your head examined. And second," she grinned beneath knitted eyebrows. "I'm going to remove the spark plugs in my car and see if he'll just take me home," she said with a wink.

"Hilde, you're terrible."

"Think it'll work?"

Relena shook her head and giggled. Grown women, giggling like school girls. Heero scowled. He did not invite Duo Maxwell over for Relena to ogle. 

Heero strode past the two women. He stopped a few feet away from his 'buddy'. Duo bent over the front of Relena's car. 

A solid chill hung in the air - with the faint scent of pine. The former Marine - the one who grew his hair into a two-foot-long braid after he got out of the Corps, because he 'hated all the haircuts' - worked at something in the front of the little Honda's engine compartment. A bit of grease stained one bicep. A large, black, cross tattoo covered the side of Duo's abdomen and ribcage; it read: "Death before dishonor."

"Oh! Hey!" Duo straightened up. And stretched. He threw a look over his shoulder at the girls. Heero seethed under his breath.

His 'friend' cringed. "You look like you haven't had enough coffee today. And you know my rule."

"I've had my coffee for the day. And I'm still going to be scary. And you'll talk to me anyway."

"Nope. Nuh-uh." Duo crossed his arms over his chest. "I'll talk to Relena. She's nice." He leaned forward and grinned. "And hot! Holy hell, how'd you get her as a neighbor?"

Heero glowered.

"Ohhhhh-ho!" His dark eyebrows knit together. For a late twenties former Marine, the guy still had plump cheeks, complete with a dimple when he grinned. "That's why you asked for a favor!" 

"I was busy. She needed help."

"And what, you run a new handyman service for your apartment complex? Nope, not buying it." He moved his head to peer around Heero. "You want those delicious legs wrapped around you while she pants out your name."

"Stop looking at her." 

"Annnnd, you just proved my point." He shrugged. "Her friend's pretty cute, though. I think I'll flex a few more times and then ask her to go have a drink with me." Violet eyes met his gaze; an irritating smirk settled on his lips. 

"What's the deal with her car?"

Duo gestured with a socket wrench. "Needs a tune up. New timing belt, water pump. She's due." He lugged the battery out from under the hood and placed it on the ground. "For the moment, she needs a new battery. Brought one from my shop, just in case." 

Heero crossed his arms and nodded.

"I'll install it, reset the radio and she'll be good to go. But, your girlfriend should still bring it by when she can - to get the other stuff done." He shrugged. "I'll do the work for her. Since she's your girl."

"Just give me the bill."

"Same old Heero." Duo leaned back against the driver's side door. "So, you two wanna grab a drink with me and the friend?"

"What makes you so sure her friend will say yes?"

"The same thing that makes me so sure you'll say no."

"Hn."

"I wish you would take me up on my offer. But, at least you're not so," Duo frowned and looked over at the girls, "alone anymore."

Heero shrugged and stared at the ground. "She suits me."

"Welp! They say there's someone for everyone," Duo said. He picked up the used battery and started towards his black-on-black Dodge Charger. "I just figured yours was like one of those old school nuns that used to rap my knuckles with a ruler - back when I was a kid." He ducked into the front seat and emerged a few seconds later with a new car battery. 

"Those rulers stung like a sonofabitch!" He hefted the battery into the Civic's engine compartment. Duo stretched and flexed again. 

"Tell me the truth, are they lookin'?" He glanced up at Heero with a wide grin.

"I think we should meet for one of our old sparring sessions."

"Yeah. No." The smile fell from Duo's features and he grazed a hand over his ribs. "I do not miss those. Buddy."

* * *

Heero couldn't hang around. Duo texted later to let him know the friend had indeed accepted his invite to drinks. The message ended with an emoji flipping Heero the bird. 

The next message arrived with an image of a napkin; someone had written: "Being this awesome: Priceless. One 5-year car battery: $70." 

'Same old Duo.' 

Later that evening, Heero's phone buzzed again. This time, the message held a picture Duo must have taken while still at the apartment complex. The image depicted Relena, leaning back against one of the posts holding up the overhang. 

Her blond hair had come down, out of the ponytail, and fell in loose waves over her shoulders.

A gentle smile on her lips, she stared at a point beyond the scope of the picture. The weak lights behind her combined with Duo's lowlight lens - captured her likeness with an ethereal glow. 

An angel wearing a hoodie and jeans. 

Duo typed one line beneath the picture: "Ask her out." 

Heero sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He stared up at his bedroom ceiling. Yeah, he should probably do that. Or maybe he shouldn't. 

He groaned. Part of him had hoped his princess would stay overnight after cooking him dinner. But, the message in their playful banter was clear - Relena wasn't going to invite herself in and take up residence in his life. She would make him work for it. For her.   
  


_"Wouldn't a woman cooking dinner for a man in his apartment on a Friday night - seem like a girlfriend?"_

_She huffed. "Maybe. If the guy in question was a little less of a jerk."_   
  


But, as their relationship stood, he considered her 'safe'. Friendly. They worked out together twice a week, ran into each other on occasion; exchanged phone numbers "just in case". Random texts sent here and there. 

Most of the time, she reached out to him during the long four days between Thursday's and Tuesday's workouts. Heero could admit - he wasn't being fair, if he was interested. And he'd be an absolute moron.... 

But, for now, she stayed a safe distance away. And, he needed safe. Relena remaining an 'almost-girlfriend' meant he wouldn't risk feeling things. 

His cellphone lit on his nightstand; it vibrated against the surface. His princess texted: "Not sure if you're still up, but thanks. Your friend was really helpful."

Heero sighed. "You're welcome." He sent the message and placed his phone down. 

That should be the end of it. He needed his early evening sleep - at least until his team finished the client's report.

Before he fully settled down, his phone buzzed again. Relena texted: "Did you eat something? I accidentally ordered too much pizza. I know you can get caught up at work and forget to eat."

Heero's lungs shoved the air out of his body with a sharp stab. He closed his eyes, drew in a breath and counted.

"I ate something." He texted his reply. It was somewhat true. A protein shake, an apple, and two peanut butter sandwiches technically qualified as food.

"You're still a lousy liar." Her message ended with an emoji sticking out its tongue. They didn't send emojis in the military. Such a weird addition to adult communication. 

Another text arrived: "I'll leave the pizza in a ziplock bag next to your door. No judgement."

He clamped his eyes shut and waited for the pang of something he could no longer name to subside; it plucked at steel threads holding him together and reverberated through his system. He should have said 'thank you'; he should have just walked across the hall and banged on her door until she let him in - really let him in - to her life. 

And then he should have kissed her. 

But Marines never say die. 

"That's how we get rats, Relena."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a really pretty picture that was created for this story - I added it to the top of chapter 1. Definitely check it out!
> 
> Disclaimer: I did not draw the picture (I can't draw much more than stick figures), but the artist who did gave me the rights to it. :)
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	4. Stubborn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Apologies for this taking an extra week. A lot of it wasn't working, so, I tried and tried again to portray a realistic set of emotions and get the characterization as right as I could. Thanks, again, so very much to all those who will read it. And I've really appreciated all the kind Comments as well. Love, ~Rose
> 
> * * *
> 
> Dedicated to Christina Morris. Your death changed our feeling of safety in a quiet, suburban town. I know we all wished your story had been a happier one. May you rest in peace.

* * *

"Stubborn" - Was a word they both could be.

Relena stuck to a fairly standard routine. Early morning workouts on Tuesdays and Thursdays meant she came home a bit later than the other days of the week. Saturdays, she often went out with friends. Sundays, she and Hilde hung out; the girls did things together like hot yoga or hiking - after attending church.

Heero, on the other hand, his work ruined any positive routines that might have carried over from the military - like rising early. With his clients based in various parts of the world, he often worked a split schedule. Something he could only manage from a virtual office, working from home. 

His work schedule also meant Heero went through phases where he didn't leave his apartment as often as he wanted. The former Marine found that during these times, self-management became important - often making up a reason to leave. Like today: Heero wanted to price new shocks for his motorcycle - and what it would cost to have the tech at the custom bike shop "The Specials" do the work. 

The former Marine found he spent more time there than he intended. Got a little distracted by a custom racing bike "Nataku" - the pet project of a motorcycle cop, and former Navy Seal: Wufei Chang.

Wufei built Nataku into a slick piece of machinery, with a shit ton of horse power. Heero found himself mildly interested in the other man's hobby. Unfortunately, the guy could talk like he took lessons from Duo. Heero learned a few things about the former Seal's last deployment, his live-in girlfriend, and the difficulties of raising a teenaged quasi-step-daughter.   
  


_"I'm constantly on her case: be alert. Watch your surroundings. Don't get caught off-guard. But, she has this disobedient streak - a mile wide. Just like her mother."  
  
_

A half-hour later, Heero managed to extract himself from the conversation. He mounted his bike and headed home.

……

Heero pulled his motorcycle into his detached garage, turned off the bike and kicked down the stand. After pulling off his helmet and putting it away, the former Marine exited the standalone structure. He entered his code into a keypad mounted on the wall. The overhead door began its descent. He started towards the apartment building.

Heero pulled his phone from his pocket. No missed messages. Which meant, no response from his princess, today. He shrugged his jacket close and tucked his phone back in his jeans, then entered the building through the side door.

'Should I text her again?' He grumbled as he stepped into the stairwell. A familiar voice reached his ears. He stopped short. 'That's her.' He peered around the corner.

Relena strode in strappy heels towards the elevator. Some privileged-looking 'dude' in his mid-twenties slouched beside her. Sloucher's sandy-brown hair sat on top of his head in a man bun; he wore khaki pants and flip-flops. In November. The other man's eyes darted around, hands shoved in pants pockets. His lips twisted into a sly smile that Heero wanted to knock off his face.

'It's none of my business.' Heero took a deep breath and held it as he started up the steps. 

He arrived on the second floor, took the few steps around the corner and stopped at his door. The elevator dinged and he heard her voice, again.

"It was really nice of you to walk me home."

"No problem. Can't have a pretty lady like you walking home by yourself."

Heero rolled his eyes; he twisted the key in the lock and shoved the door open.

"Um, so, yeah, thanks. I'm ok from here. I'll see you at work tomorrow. Same as usual. Right?"

Heero halted the door before it closed. 'That's a brush off.' He peered through a wedge-shaped crack in the door.

Relena gave Sloucher a quick hug where the two corridors intersected, and then turned away. Heero couldn't see her mouth to read her lips, but he read her body language: she wasn't interested. She was just nice. Too damned nice - all the time.

She walked the rest of the way to her door. Sloucher followed.

'You don't let them know where you live. Come on, Relena. This is how women go missing.' Heero gripped his doorknob and stepped out into the hallway. Not that Sloucher fit the bill, but the Marine Corps put them through an entire unit on how to recognize signs of human trafficking. The stories survivors told still chilled the blood in his veins...

He wanted to be visible. He wanted Sloucher to leave. He wanted to make sure she entered her apartment - safe, and alone. Then, he wanted to shake some sense into her!

Heero crossed his arms and waited. Relena turned and recoiled when she saw her escort behind her. She gave him a tight-lipped smile and waved. Sloucher remained rooted in place. She turned her back to him, again, and unlocked her door. 

'And you definitely don't open the door until they leave. Fuck!' Alarm rose like so much acidic bile - moving the wrong way up his throat. Before Relena could set foot into her apartment, Sloucher grabbed her shoulders, and whirled her around!

A cry of surprise tore from her lips. "What are—" 

He clamped his mouth over hers _._

Heero's whole body bristled. 'But,' he swallowed. 'She can handle this.' He breathed and waited. 'She said she takes self-defense classes. I'm just here for backup.'

Relena pushed at Sloucher's chest. She kicked him in the shins. He broke the kiss and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, picking her up, and stepping forward - like he meant to haul her inside the apartment.

A red haze fell over Heero's vision _._

She must have bit him. Her attacker recoiled, but didn't drop her. Just uttered an exclamation that sounded like: "You bitch!" And tried to swing the squirming, kicking, woman into her residence.

Relena landed an elbow to the guy's face. Her attacker held tight. 

Heero leapt across the hall! He pulled Relena free and shoved her roughly into her apartment. "Lock the fucking door!" He slammed the panel shut and turned _._

"You should run." Heero gave Sloucher one warning more than the piece of excrement deserved.

"I'm her boyfriend. She likes to roleplay like I'm—"

A satisfying 'crunch' filled his ears. The thrill of landing a solid punch sang through his muscles. His veins. 

Sloucher cried out and sunk to the floor. Heero picked him up by his polo shirt collar and growled.

"Heero! Stop! Please!" Relena's voice filtered into his ear. Another voice: his, yelled something about killing animals who treated women like shit.

Relena grabbed Heero from behind, locking her arms around his chest. He blinked. Sloucher sagged against the wall, sniveling. Blood trickled from his nose and his eye started to swell.

"Please, Heero."

"Get. Back. Inside, Relena."

He snarled at Sloucher. "You, get out of here. Now."

* * *

"Relena! Let me in." Heero yelled at her apartment door. He slammed his fist against the metal. 

"No. Not until you calm down."

"Not until I— God dammit!" He kicked at it; the thing jarred. Metal scraped against metal, but the door held. One of the lower panels dented. "Open this door."

Relena inched her door open; her eyes peeked out over the safety chain. She met his gaze and slammed it shut. "No," she yelled again. 

He rested his forehead against the door and gulped breaths of air. "At least tell me whether you're ok."

"Am I ok? How am I supposed to know if I'm ok?" Her voice trembled. The sound provoked him all over again. He needed to see her. He needed to know she wasn't hurt. He needed to make sure this never happened again.

"I will call the police myself. You need to turn him in. He deserves to be locked in a pen like an animal!"

"He's a coworker. He offered to walk me home. I thought he was being nice! I'm just supposed to have him arrested? And then what? How do I explain anything at work?"

"I don't care - what happens to him. What people think. I'll dial 911 if you don't come out, right now!"

"You're a jerk, Yuy." A couple of light thuds - possibly the sound of her smaller fists against the other side of her door. "You've always been a jerk, and you're too stubborn to change!"

He ground his teeth together.The sound of her cry still echoed in his ears. "I'm stubborn? I'm not the stubborn one. How many times have I told you?" His voice cracked as he continued to shout. His throat reminded him he'd been yelling for a while.

"You're too trusting. We don't live in some fairytale where you get to flit about like a princess."

He continued to pound on the door. "We live in the middle of a city, Relena. With crime. And the human equivalent of rats!" 

"Is there anyone I can trust in your world? Or is everyone some kind of predator?"

"You can't blindly trust anyone." He fell back against her door and ran a hand through his hair. Heero took a shaking breath. She was right: he needed to calm the fuck down.

"Not even you?"

A deep breath. Hold it in. Count to ten. Let it out. "Not even me."

More thuds. Vibrations coursed through the door at his back. A sniffle. A sob.

He clenched his jaw.

Then a soft: "You don't have to yell at me. What happened was already bad enough."

She had a point. He continued his breathing; his heartbeat slowed from a blind rush to a gallop.

"But you can't just show up and be some nice guy hero and still push me away all the time. You're confusing and I hate it!" 

He whirled around. "I'm confusing? Then let me spell it out for you: it's a God damned full time job just protecting you!" He fought back the urge to actually break down her door. "Anything more, and you'd be the death of me." 

Heero beat on the metal panel; pain sank into his knuckles. It throbbed through his arm and reverberated in his chest. "Relena!" 

"Protecting me?" She yanked open the door. Her eyes looked puffy and red. The fight left his body with just a glance.

"I really need a, what, a bodyguard? Because I'm too dumb to fend for myself?" Her complexion heated from pale to mottled red. "Too helpless? Clearly, I'm just a little girl, right?" She took a step towards him; light flashed in her eyes. In fact, it clung to her - flaring around her skin, her hair, her whole body. It was a trick of the eyes, his mind, when adrenaline hit his system. But she glowed. 

Vivid. Alive.

And for a moment, he'd have given anything to be like her….

"Just a little girl who needs her God damned next-door-neighbor-turned-overgrown-Boy-Scout to take care of her!"

She trembled all over, but whether it was from anger or fear, he didn't know. But, he could see her, now. The rage fled his body, and his training kicked in. 

'Comfort, don't blame. Support. Be 'safe'. Get them to report the attack.'

He straightened his shoulders and inhaled. "Not dumb. Not helpless." 

The rush of adrenaline leached from his body. Ice cold water swirled around him and assaulted his chest. Heero felt like he'd been treading water past his limit. He started to sink.

"You're," Heero tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear, "too kind. Beautiful." He tilted her head to make Relena look at him. A shudder ran through her; she met his gaze. 

Warm, aquamarine eyes stared into him - providing a lifeline to shore. And he wondered if she was the one who needed saving...

"Too many missing people." His palm cupped the back of her head. He moved pieces of wet hair from where they stuck to her cheek. "I've seen too many. Terrible things…."

'And it almost happened to you.' A distant pang. A feeling of loss. How could she make him feel…

Heero leaned forward and kissed her. Her mouth curved up, and then she pressed her lips against his. He moved them out of the hallway into her apartment and shut the door with his foot. Heero wrapped his arms around her waist and brought his mouth down over hers, again.

He held her close; the tears on her cheek wetting his face, her lips warm and sweet. A trace of perfume wafted from her neck. She smelled of cinnamon and citrus. He brought his hands up to cup her face as his mouth left hers to kiss her cheeks, her eyes, her forehead. He pulled her into his chest.

Relena's arms slid up his back; her hands clutched his shirt between his shoulder blades. He held her while she sobbed.

A couple of minutes passed. The tremors coursing through her…lessened. 

"Did he hurt you?"

"No. He just— He scared me." She shuddered. "And then you. You looked like you were going to really hurt him. And that's not like you…." A watery smile. "He must have scared you, too."

"Why are you so angry with me?"

"I just... You kept yelling at me. Like I did this. Like I would ever want...that. And if you, who saw what he did. If you saw it and thought I was somehow to blame. What would anyone else think?"

"It's not your fault." He shook his head. "It's not your fault."

"I don't know what I'm going to do. At work, tomorrow."

"He'll probably call in sick. Monday's another story, but. We'll figure it out by then."

"I've never seen you...angry before." She lifted her head. "Were you? Were you afraid for me, Heero?"

The room shrunk; the oxygen evaporated and left only heated, unbreathable air. He did the only thing he could think of - and kissed her, again.

He tasted the salt of her tears as their lips met in a slow, languid kiss. The kind that made him wish they were in her bed and he had all day - to just kiss her. Every inch of her; starting at her toes and working his way up her body.

Strands of hair slipped through his fingers. Relena broke away. She pressed her forehead against his neck. Her breath warmed his skin and breathed life into his chest.

A couple of minutes crawled by.

"Do you really think I'm beautiful?" She said in a hoarse whisper.

"Hn." His voice rumbled. "You already know the answer to that."

"I didn't. Until you said it, Heero." She raised her head and met his gaze. "Women don't know what goes on in men's heads, you know."

'Clearly.'

Relena's hands moved to the front of his chest. She toyed with the Saint Michael medallion that hung around his neck. "A big, bad Marine like you could think I'm a charitable cause. Or something."

He kissed the top of her head. "You think I'm big and bad, now?" He tried to smile at his own, weak joke.

"Oh?" One eyebrow rose. "So, now, we're advertising our sexual prowess?" She pressed her lips together and shook her head.

"No. I am. Yours is," he tilted his head and took in the blush coloring her features. "I'm guessing non-existent."

She glared up at him; her whole face contorted into a scowl. "It is, now. As far as you're concerned." She twisted from his grip. "And you've graduated from jerk to certified ass." She pointed at the door. "Go."

Heero chuckled. He liked getting a rise out of her. "Maybe so," he said and crossed his arms. "But, I decided a while ago, you're the only one who suits me."

Relena's eyes went wide. "I suit you?"

"And, do you know what my specialty was? In the Marine Corps?" He leaned down and into her personal space. 

She drew back and her face turned a few degrees to her left. "No?"

He met her gaze and held it. Heero stared at her, into her. Through her. "Sniper."

Princess or not, that should tell her everything she needed to know. He would wait. Patiently. Unmoving. Vigilant. For his target - for her. As she was now the Mission Objective. Heero turned around and let himself out into the hallway.

"Snipers are the overgrown Boy Scouts of stalkers!" Relena called out after him. 

He paused, turned his head and shot her a look. "I think that's the motto on the insignia."

Heero closed the door, but not before he heard her say: "You're still a jerk."


	5. Avoidance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out alphaikaros' really sweet fanart from Chapter 4: [Such a sweet picture!](https://alphaikaros.tumblr.com/post/638498326065627136/inspired-by-this-lovely-fic-by-the-lovely)
> 
> Thank you alphaikaros!!! :D

* * *

Chapter 5

"Avoidance" - Was a game they both played.

The next night, Relena knocked at his door; Heero powered down his game and let her in. 

"Hey," she said and handed over a couple of grocery sacks. The smile she gave him was different than last time. Softer. 

He nodded and repeated the greeting. 

"I hope you're hungry." 

"Twenty-four seven." 

She flipped her hair off one shoulder. "Once a Marine always a Marine?" 

"Semper Fi." Heero placed the bags on the counter. He turned to give her a better greeting, but she slipped around him into the kitchen. He frowned.

Relena made her way to the oven - long legs covered in dark-colored tights.The tights did nothing to detract from their allure. A short, casual-looking green skirt drew his eyes to the pleasing curve of her hips.

His hunger was different than last time, too.

She pressed buttons on the oven, then opened and closed the door.

"Steak and potatoes again?" Heero began removing groceries from the bag and placing them on the counter: a pre-made container of 'organic mashed russet potatoes'; a fresh stalk of broccoli. No jalapeños?

"Grilled portobello mushrooms on hamburger buns. For the vegan in you." Relena grabbed the other bag.

He pulled the styrofoam and cellophane-wrapped steaks out of the bottom of his grocery sack and held them up. "Now who's a liar?"

Her lips twisted and she looked away. "Nothing says 'thank you for keeping a girl from being date raped' like steak and potatoes." Relena plucked the containers from his hands. She ran water into a pot. Settled a sauté pan on the stove. 

"He was your date?" Heero's hand bent and flexed; his skin felt tight. His knuckles throbbed.

"No, I told you. A coworker." She kept her eyes downcast. "It was a work 'happy hour' at a bar around the corner. He offered to walk me home. He seemed," she shrugged one shoulder. "Nice. At first." She rinsed the broccoli and placed it on a cutting board. 

Heero glanced down at his hand. A bluish-green stripe marred the flesh of his knuckles. 

"As opposed to someone who seems like a jerk, but who's actually pretty nice." 

His breath caught outside his lungs. She had a way of doing that to him. It felt uncomfortable - similar to his training. Discomfort became a challenge. Something for him to learn from. Improve. Grow. 

"Hn. Where's my beer?" He peered into the other sack.

She turned and planted a hand on her hip. "Don't push it, Yuy."

He narrowed his eyes. "Did you, by chance, Ms. Darlian, bring me more delicious ale?" Heero placed a hand on the counter and hovered close; so close, he could lean down and kiss her.... 

"I'd sure be grateful."

Relena moved away. Around him. She pulled the over-sized bottle from the bag and held it out to him. One eyebrow arched. "Was the Southern drawl for my benefit? Or just the only time you've heard someone speak who had manners?"

He brushed his fingers against hers when he drew the bottle from her grip. She blushed and looked away. 

"Spent time in the Carolinas*." He popped the top from the bottle.

"Oh?" 

"Parris Island. Boot camp."

"Ah yes. Marine boot camp." She plunked one seasoned steak into the sauté pan. The meat sizzled; the smell whet his appetite. 

"Where they taught you to be a stalker, I mean, sniper."

"Hn." He took a sip of his craft specialty IPA. "Where's yours?"

"I left mine in your fridge. Didn't you notice?"

Heero shrugged and moved to the refrigerator to grab her beer. Another thud from the pan indicated she'd flipped the steak over - to sear the other side.

"What did you do before the Marines?"

"High school. Like everyone else." He used his t-shirt to twist off the cap from the lager she drank. 

"What did you do before princess school?" Heero handed her the beer and leaned on the counter beside her.

"I went to fairy princess school," she said with her eyes on the pan. "Where we learned to flit about in fairy tales, thank you very much."

"Ah." There's the Relena he knew. The one who made him want to kiss her smart mouth shut.

"High school. College." She used a pair of tongs to move the steak to an oven pan. A pot of water boiled on the back burner. She turned the temperature down and covered the pot.

"So, being a fairy princess is an advanced degree."

"Absolutely." She deposited the other steak in the oven pan. "And stalkers are apparently Prince Charming school dropouts." She finally looked at him. Her mouth tucked up on one side; delicate, red veins showed in her eyes. 

He brushed a piece of hair from her face, intent on stealing a kiss. But before he could claim her lips, she gasped and moved away. 

"The potatoes. I need to heat them up." She grabbed the container from the counter and flipped it over. "I, uh," she stepped around him. "Yeah. Be right back."

"Hn." He tried to keep from growling.

Relena moved to the other end of the kitchen, removed the wrapping on the potatoes and stuffed the container in the microwave. 

"I don't stalk you." He sipped his beer. "Yet."

"Very comforting, Yuy."

* * *

Heero carried the plates of food to the table. He moved a chair for her to sit down. Once she settled in, he sat in the chair beside her. Relena gave him a tight-lipped smile. 

"You all right?" He said and leaned towards her.

"Yeah." She looked at her plate, ran a shaky hand over her forehead. "Just," she sighed, "on edge most of the day." Relena glanced up, but didn't meet his gaze. "I'm better, now. Thank you." She touched his arm.

Heero felt her warmth suffuse from his arm to his shoulder. Then, his stomach dispelled the effect with a groan.

They ate in silence. Heero tried to slow his usual pace. While appropriate for military life, he presumed rapid food inhalation didn't impress fairy princesses. 

Relena cut her food into perfect squares, chewed with a closed mouth, and dabbed at the corner of her lips with her napkin.

"This. It's good. Didn't think they'd teach cooking in fairy princess school."

"It's actually a very important skill. Not as much magic required when a fairy princess can cook."

"Hn. Didn't know that."

She pushed a piece of broccoli to the edge of her plate. "There may be a lot you don't know about fairy princesses."

"I think I know this one pretty well." He glanced at his empty dish and sighed. She still had food on her plate. 

"Do you?"

Heero grabbed his beer and sat back in his chair. "You tell me."

"What do you really know about me?" Relena met his gaze. Her eyes gleamed a brilliant shade of bluish green. But, she had a tight set to her jaw, and the muscles of her neck strained against her skin.

This, some form of this, question - bothered her. It was why she was here.

Heero swallowed and took a deep breath. As a sniper, the Marines trained him - to know and recognize 'moments'. 

Moments, when all the training: his focused mind, muscle memory, weapon knowledge. When all the preparation: target reconnaissance, angle of attack, position scouting. When all the setup: hidden amidst the terrain, barrel aimed, trajectory known. 

Everything came together in one, crucial, moment - when the sniper squeezed the trigger and took his shot.

"I know the woman I see," he took in a breath. "Has a smart mouth. A clever sense of humor." He exhaled. His pulse sounded uniform in its rhythm.

"A kind heart." He held her gaze. "And tenacious spirit." He leaned forward. "Which is the nice way of saying she's stubborn as fuck."

"Look who's talking." Her lips pressed together and she tilted her head.

"She's patient. A little old fashioned - in just the right way." 

She stared at him. Tears collected in the corners of her eyes. 

"Do I need some facts and figures to tell me who you are? Or do I have an accurate picture?"

"They clearly don't teach flattery in sniper school."

He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "Not a tool we need for the job."

"I guess not." She folded her hand over his, pulling it down to the table. Their fingers tangled together.

"Besides, my fairy princess doesn't like empty flattery."

"She doesn't?"

"No. She'd rather have genuine respect and admiration."

"Well, true. But not very princessy, when you think about it." She narrowed her eyes and stuck out her chin.

"I won't tell."

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

"So you dropped out of fairy princess school?"

"Hm. Expelled. Actually." 

"A rebellious fairy princess," he said with a chuckle. "That, I'd believe." A picture of her in a Cinderella dress popped into his mind - with a leather jacket thrown over her shoulders and motorcycle boots peeking out from under the elaborate gown.

She giggled, and the air in the room lightened. "I like hearing you laugh."

'I'll like hearing you scream.' God, he wanted to heft her onto his kitchen table and take her right there. 

"I like you, Heero." Relena spoke to their joined hands. She lifted her eyes to meet his. "I like being with you."

The uncomfortable feeling surfaced, again. His shot taken - time to retreat. Except. That's not how this mission worked. "I told you before. You're the only one who suits me." 

He stood from the chair with his plate. There could still be potatoes….

* * *

Heero cleared the dishes from the table and stacked them in the sink. They'd keep until morning. He held out his hand to help Relena out of her seat. "You don't always have to cook." 

"No?" She rose to her feet. "You cook?"

Heero shook his head. "I eat. What I cook isn't for normal humans. But, there are places called restaurants." He met her gaze. "I could take you to one. I think you'd like the experience. They cook for you."

"That. Sounds like a date, Mr. Yuy." She crossed her arms. "Or should I refer to you by your rank?" 

Heero moved to the den and sat on the sofa. He hoped she would follow him. Maybe this time...

"Sergeant?" Her voice called out after him.

"Lousy guess." He moved closer to the center of the sofa. Then back to the cushion farthest from the kitchen. "Sergeant is too vague." He shifted, again, and leaned back against the cushions.

"Hm. I guess Mr. Yuy will have to do." Her voice grew nearer. He could make out her darkened reflection in the powered-off monitor. 

"I was a CSO, Critical Skills Operator. Called us Raiders." He watched her reflection. "I commanded an MSOT, a team, before MARSOC."

"Where did you, um, live?" Relena hovered behind him. The position reminded him of interviewing tactics designed to make detainees uncomfortable. 

"Nowhere for long. Stationed at Camp Pendleton."

"Ah. California."

"You're from Florida. The panhandle?"

"Someone's been Internet-searching his neighbors." Her reflection pursed its lips together; she placed her hands on the back of the sofa.

"Can't be too careful." He craned his head to look at her. It made for a nice view. Her chest, at this angle, held a pleasing, rounded shape - in a white, thermal shirt (with two buttons undone). She met his gaze.

"I have top secret clearance. You could be a spy."

Her eyebrows lifted. "That sounds far more exciting than being a PR analyst."

"Hn. I don't want or need exciting. Being normal is enough."

She dipped her head and looked him in the eye. "I don't think you count as normal."

"Should have seen me before. I was a real hardass."

"Was?"

He shot her a look out of the corner of his eye. He still wanted to kiss her and shut her up. He just wanted to kiss her. 

"So, you're all soft and squishy, now, is that it?"

Heero let out a puff of air. "No."

"So, what do you do, now?" Her hands moved closer. "For work, I mean."

"I run a small group of dark web researchers and threat intel analysts. My own consulting company.”

"Oh! Wow. That's incredibly interesting." 

Heero's reflection took a last sip of his craft beer and set the bottle on the wooden tv stand nearby. "We provide targeted data and reporting about cyber threats. It's a niche offering." He looked up at her, again. "Something I can do because of my military background and security clearance."

"Sounds," her hands moved closer. "Stressful?"

Heero frowned. Stressful compared to what?

Her hands touched his shoulders. Heero flinched.

“Is it...not ok? For me to touch you?"

He sucked in a breath. "It's. It's ok."

Relena smoothed her palms from the base of his neck to the edge of his shoulders. Her fingers kneaded his trapezius muscles through the fabric of his t-shirt. Her thumbs slid down to work into the lower part of the muscles - urging them to relax. 

He fought to breathe, to keep from tensing under her ministrations. Heero clamped his eyes shut, clenched his jaw, drew air and counted to five. One of her hands moved up to press soothing circles into the section of muscle that ran down his neck. 

Those strained trapezius muscles finally relented. And her touch felt: succoring. Warm. Promising. 

"Hnnnnnnn." Little by little, his neck and shoulders yielded to her touch - as she coaxed one muscle fiber at a time to relax.

'I'm sure I can find a way to repay the favor.' The urge to kiss her rose to the surface of his mind, again. And his brain wasted no time in forwarding the desire down his spine. It thrummed through his body, and made his limbs feel lighter.

With munitions transport lines established, his brain replayed the memory of their last kiss from the night before.   
  


_He tasted the salt of her tears as their lips met in a slow, languid kiss. His chest tightened and her nails dug into his skin - through the thin t-shirt he wore._

_Strands of hair slipped through his fingers_ .  
  


After several, incredible minutes of her massaging his neck and shoulders, Heero reached up and caught her hand. He towed her around the edge of the sofa to stand in front of him; then pulled her into his lap. 

'Finally.'

Relena smiled; her palm cupped his cheek, and she pressed her lips to his. Heero opened his mouth and brought one hand up to the back of her neck - urging her closer. He deepened the kiss. 

After a few, slow, heartbeats, she pulled away. 

"You changed the subject,” Heero said.

"I did? What were we talking about?"

"Me, taking you on a date."

"This isn't a date?" Her fingers traced a path over his left ear.

"I'm fine if it is, but, I don't mind taking you out." He studied her face. "Unless there's a reason you're avoiding the topic."

"No. You seemed like more of a homebody, to me. Not in a bad way." 

"I am. But, you're not as much of one."

She looked away.

"I'd like to," he tipped her chin in his direction, "do something you'd enjoy."

"Then it's a date. About time you asked me, really. You're not very good at hints." Relena smiled and rose from his lap.

"And you're terrible at subtext." Heero stood and caged her in a loose embrace.

"Am I?"

Her citrusy cinnamon scent caught his attention - amplifying his brain's focus on a singular cause: seduce Relena. It throbbed and hummed through his veins like a lively melody. 

"Like this: you should stay for dessert."

"Oh! You didn't strike me as a guy who'd have much of a sweet tooth." She turned in his grip. "But, I have gelato—" 

Heero tightened his arms around her. "Not what I meant." 

"You mean," she fidgeted with the small medallion on his neck, "something else."

Heero remained quiet. Listening. 

"Hm. I have a policy of not sleeping with a guy on the first date." 

"It's not our first date." He mentally sighed. He'd have to be content with holding her like this. The melody softened; the sound became sweeter.

"True. It's negative one. We haven't even had our first date."

Heero frowned at the sharp note. "So, you cooking dinner, us working out together - doesn't count?"

She smiled and pecked his lips. "That. Was incredibly sweet. And endearing." Relena pulled away.

Wait. Why was she leaving?

"You've been deflecting. Avoiding me. This. Us."

"And yet I was the one knocking on your door." She grabbed her pocketbook and keys from his counter. 

Heero beat her to the door. She halted; blond hair formed a curtain in front of her face.

"I said you're the only one who suits me, Relena." 

She took a loud, rasping breath.

"It means," he swallowed against a strained feeling in the back of his throat, "what it sounds like."

"It sounds like," her voice trembled. “Almost like." She turned towards him; her eyebrows peaked in the midst of her forehead. "A 'till death do us part' type of statement. And that's—"

"Scary." The melody quieted. The room fell silent around them. "For you. Apparently."

Her mouth opened, closed. Her fingers traced the logo on top of her small, black pocketbook. 

Finally, her voice - just above a whisper: "Thrilling and frightening. It’s just. It’s too rushed. Too soon. We only...." She ran a hand through her hair and sat back against his door. "This is the first time you've told me anything. About yourself."

"I know."

"Was it intentional? Not telling me? Because it's classified, or your job, or—"

"There are details I can't share. But, we were conditioned. To keep information about ourselves, the mission. Close." He shoved his hands in his jean pockets. "It's a bad excuse. But I—" He shrugged his shoulders. "In all fairness, I didn't expect…."

"Didn't expect, what, Heero?"

"If you were just an acquaintance, it wouldn't matter. Would it?”

"Hm. Your soft and squishy side is showing.” She stood on tiptoe and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. 

Heero covered her mouth with his; his arms wound around her. He pressed her body against him. Into him. The melody began again - the notes hitting between sweet and a driving, steady beat. 

When a certain part of his anatomy started making demands, he released her.

"I don't want to avoid you." She lingered in his embrace.

"Good. Now, leave before I get to the point where I can't let you." He held his arms at his sides.

"Can't let me—" Relena stopped; she blinked. "Ah. Got it." She gave him a quick kiss and rushed out the door.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Technically, Heero would have spent time in Parris Island (S. Carolina) and Camp Lejeune (N. Carolina). Just an FYI.
> 
> I hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday season! Love, ~Rose


	6. Maddening. Difficult.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The picture at the top of this chapter is supposed to be the one that Duo took on his phone and texted in chapter 3. :D

* * *

AN: Apologies for the delay, the chapter is a bit longer. And I've upped the rating to M for Mature. Because Heero is a perv. (and we like it).  
Happy belated New Year! Love, ~Rose

* * *

**Losing my Breath**

**Chapter 6**

"Maddening."

"Difficult."

Defined the relationship.

The following Friday night, Heero knocked on her door for a third time. He waited. "Relena!" Adjusted his hold on the bouquet of lilies. Quieted racing thoughts. Breathed. Listened.

No answer.

The rush began again: 'Where is she? Is she hurt? Is she angry? Did she forget? How could she forget!'

He banged on her door. His hand shook. Heero tucked his right hand under his left arm and waited for the tremor to subside. "Relena! Open up!"

Silence.

'She hasn't called or texted.' Heero leaned back against the wall. He ran a hand through his hair. It trembled. 'Dammit, stop. Calm down.'

He sent her a text. Worked to quiet himself.

Breathed.

Waited.

A grayish white haze trickled in. Then flowed. Heero let it take away the rush. His mind and body stilled. He thought nothing. Felt...

He found his breath.

"I'm here, I'm here!" A woman power-walked in long strides around the corner. "I know I'm late, but I got stuck with this stupid project and—"

Heero blinked. She came into focus. Relena. "We have a date."

"Yes, I'm aware. Just." She heaved a sigh and sent him a sharp look. "Give me a few minutes to get changed. You can come in." She squeezed his forearm before unlocking the door.

He liked her touch.

"Grab a drink from the fridge while you wait."

Her apartment was the smaller version of his, and mirror-opposite. The entryway felt closed without the den; her kitchen sat to the right of the door. The living area held a few pieces of wood furniture - a coffee table, a sofa table; a bookshelf. Clean surfaces. A few picture frames. He drifted into her residence.

A couple of bottles of his new favorite IPA sat in her fridge. Heero opened one and moved to the living room. He pushed against the haze and focused on the cold feeling of the bottle in his hand.

The air and his surroundings sharpened. Heero sank into Relena's couch; he liked the colors: a royal blue with dark red and green stripes and a faint damask. The dark wood coffee table rose to the perfect height to rest his boots.

He took a sip of his beer.

A few, sparse, photos peppered the walls and leant her apartment a 'lived in' air. She still hung a paper calendar on the wall of her kitchen. An interesting painting hung above the fireplace - of a young woman wearing a red and black dress; a crimson flag slung over her left shoulder, she walked through a field carrying a black sword.

'Why that painting?'

The shush of water; pipes groaned. Heero sighed and launched the app on his phone: he moved their reservation back an hour. Thankfully, the restaurant he had chosen - a comfortable walking distance (even in heels) - still had openings.

A shower. She had to take a—

'Fuck.' He almost choked on a swallow of beer. His date showered a few feet away. He couldn't (and didn't want to) dispel the mental image of her: drenched the way she'd been the first time he saw her, but nude. Water droplets dotting her skin and clinging to intimate, sensitive places. And little blond curls...

Heero stood up and started pacing as the rush began again. 'Who else has she invited in like this? Doesn't she realize how vulnerable she is?'

Breathe. Pace. Breathe.

'Should I join her? No. Not on the first date. Is this a test?'

Breathe. Pace.

_She lathered soap across her abdomen, working her hands over delicate skin. A light, dusting of bubbles trailed behind as her fingers skimmed over the wet, pebbled surface of her breasts._

He measured his steps around the room, and counted his breaths. And then a different mental image appeared:

_Heero pressed her soaked body against the shower wall. Streams of water beat his shoulders as he bit kisses down her neck to the swell of her breast. Relena moaned; he slipped his fingers between her legs—_

Pace. Pace. Breathe. Pace.

The heated apartment air buzzed around him. 'Too heavy. It's too heavy to breathe. How long has she been in the shower?' He glanced at his watch. 'Five minutes?'

Heero hung his head. He let himself out of her residence and paced measured steps outside - in the hallway. He needed to calm his body - his pulse, his thoughts.

_He turned her around; her hips tilted. Heero guided his erection to the opening in her velvet-soft folds._

Heero panted and pressed his forehead against the cool window situated between their apartments.

And breathed.

* * *

Thirty minutes to shower and change was probably a record for a fairy princess. But, not for the former Marine.

Finally, she called out: "Ready." And stepped into the living room.

While Heero hadn't thought she needed to change, he could appreciate the transformation. His 'friend' and neighbor had worn 'business casual' clothes: a long sweater coat and jeans, comfortable shoes; upswept hair.

Heero's 'date', however, pulled a piece of her loose, dark-blond hair behind one ear. Her makeup made her eyelashes darker; her eyes rounder. Relena shrugged one shoulder underneath a loose, light blue sweater; a dark-colored skirt clung to her hips. Gray, knee-high boots left her lower thigh exposed.

Heero wanted to taste her.

Instead, he handed her the flowers he'd brought and offered her a smile.

She met his gaze with a grin of her own. 'I should just take her back to her shower.' Heero shoved his hands in his pockets.

"Stargazer lilies? Interesting choice."

He leaned back against the wall beside her door. "They looked like you."

"Do you believe flowers have meanings?"

He gestured at himself. "What do you think?" Heero had 'dressed up' for her, for their date: a button down shirt and blazer over jeans and his usual work boots. Still a far cry from her 'handsome prince.'

A hint of a smile toyed with her lips. "I've always thought you looked like a guy that knows exactly what he wants to say - and when he wants to say it."

Relena pulled a vase from her cabinet, and ran water into the container. "So, you likely didn't choose red roses on purpose." She unbound the flowers from a clear plastic surround.

"But, stargazer lilies in dark pink espouse a general optimism. And purity."

"They were on sale."

"You're still a terrible liar." Relena peered at him around her cabinets. "I know, at least, you weren't a spy."

"General reconnaissance." He crossed his arms. "Not the lying kind of spying."

"The sentiment is very sweet."

The wall to his left attracted his attention. For no particular reason.

"You said you were going to take me to this novel place called a restaurant?"

He found her again with his eyes. She placed the vase in the center of her countertop. The lillies stood tall; the blooms strong and bright. A spicy, exotic fragrance drifted into the air.

"Reconnaissance reports suggest it has all four food groups: steak, potatoes, IPA and lager."

She laughed. "You're a true romantic, Heero Yuy."

"No. But, you know what you're getting into."

She folded her arm into his, and he led them out of her apartment.

"And, while we're on the subject. None of my intentions are pure, Relena."

She met his gaze; her complexion turned a shade brighter than the lilies. "Well, I don't think it meant—"

"I left your apartment while you were showering. If I wasn't an overgrown Boy Scout. You were inviting trouble."

"Maybe I did it on purpose."

He stopped. "We're going back to your shower."

"Ok, ok, I didn't do it on purpose." She tugged him into the elevator. "I'm sorry for tempting you. When you've been," Relena smiled, "mostly good to me."

"I haven't even started, yet."

She met his gaze again. "I'm starting to wonder if you learned anything in Prince Charming school." She stepped off the elevator. Heero took a couple of long strides to catch up with her.

"I was expelled as soon as I arrived on my motorcycle - instead of a white horse."

"Now you're just trying to convince me you're a bad boy."

He opened the exit door, and let her go first. A blast of chilled air rifled his collar as they stepped onto the sidewalk. "Did it work?"

She elbowed him in the ribs. "No, overgrown Boy Scout. It didn't. And I prefer an emotionally mature man."

He held out his arm; she slipped her gloved hand in the crook of his elbow. "I don't cry. Or wear pink."

Relena giggled. She leaned into his arm. The sound of her heels clicked on the concrete.

The night smelled of frost. A haze of gray clouds obscured the sky. Street lamps lit the air and the ground in patches. The clink and clack of an elevated train whooshed nearby.

"What about getting in touch with your feminine side?"

Heero tilted his head towards her. "No."

She laughed; her breath puffed like clouds in the air as they walked. "You're just bitter over not getting into princess school."

"Damn right."

* * *

The second course qualified as "difficult".

A myriad of restaurants operated within walking distance of their apartment. Friday nights bustled with patrons and served free, appetizing smells to passers-by. Heero had chosen one that offered reservations, a quiet ambiance and a moderate price tag.

Upon arrival, a hostess with a familiar voice showed the couple to their table - a booth in a quiet corner. He slipped a small bill into the lady's hand; she smiled, nodded at his date with a grin, and headed off.

Round fixtures held flameless candles situated in the center of the table. A single orchid plumed from a tiny vase. Heero sat across from her in the cozy restaurant booth. Under the table, his legs stretched at an angle; her boot pressed against the side of his calf.

He liked the small connection.

No specialty IPA, they chatted back and forth over choosing a bottle of wine.

"Do you prefer red or white?"

"Red at least has some health benefits. At least, that's what I tell myself."

"Hn. What kind?"

"Depends. Are we choosing based on what goes with our dinner, or based on courses or—" she stopped. Bit her lip. Looked up at him. "I like a nice Pinot Noir?"

Heero nodded and looked at the list. He read several names and shrugged. "The only thing I know is Oregon makes a good one?"

One eyebrow lifted. "And where did you hear that?"

"Airforce pilot. Wanted to make wine after the military."

"I like Oregon Pinot Noirs. This one? From Williamette Valley? Oh, um, I can buy the wine. At least."

"You've bought, and cooked me dinner twice. Not including the pizza."

"But, I—"

"You're a modern princess. But, your kingdom's currency isn't accepted here. You're stuck letting me pay for dinner."

Her lips curved. "Your consulting business must do pretty well?"

"I can pay my employees and make a reasonable living. Could be more - if I dedicated people to marketing and sales."

Her leg brushed his. She rested clasped hands on the edge of the table.

"Right now, I have all the business I can handle by word of mouth."

"Who knew you were so entrepreneurial?" She lifted greenish-blue eyes up to meet his gaze. He stared back. Her pink lips formed a subtle pout. That insatiable urge to kiss her started nagging him, again.

A small basket of rolls landed on the table in front of them; a waiter wearing a white apron over a tie and shirtsleeves appeared. The man spoke words, but Heero didn't listen. He grunted and gestured at Relena to convey the important message: 'ask her'.

Relena opened her menu and engaged the man in conversation. Heero blinked and the waiter shuffled off towards the back of the restaurant.

"You ok?"

"Hm?" He glanced across the table. "Yeah. Why?"

"You seemed a little distracted."

"Just hungry. And I don't like to fill up on bread."

"I wish I could say the same. About bread. I should add an extra workout day just to burn off the bread calories."

He swallowed the urge to suggest another way to burn calories. But, he couldn't hide the smile.

She huffed and rolled her eyes: "You and your subtext!"

* * *

After the lengthy process of ordering and pouring wine - their food arrived. Relena smiled at him over a plate of blackened redfish and sautéed vegetables. "It smells amazing." She took a bite.

"How is it?" Heero cut into the large filet. It wasn't as red as he liked, but it tasted all right.

"Good. Yours?"

Heero glanced down at his steak and shrugged. "Hm."

"Just 'hm'?"

"My neighbor makes a better one. And she makes house calls."

Her face lit with laughter. "Don't get used to it."

"Too late."

"Hmmmm." She turned her head to give him a sidelong glance that made him think of sex.

Heero motioned at her plate: "I don't always have to have steak and potatoes. I do eat other things."

Relena nodded her head a bit too much. "Oh, yeah, very convincing. Considering." She pointed at his plate of steak. With potatoes - and green beans.

"I just meant: we can eat things you like." He studied his plate. "Isn't that what couples do? Compromise?"

"Couples?"

Heero scowled. "We've discussed this."

"We have?"

He straightened in his seat. "You're avoiding again. Or playing a game. And you're not like the women that play games."

Blue-green eyes sparked in the overhead light. "You could ask me."

"Ask you to, be my girlfriend? Be exclusive? What do you need me to say, Relena?"

"Either of those would have been fine." She picked the napkin out of her lap. "Without the attitude. Heero." Relena slapped it on the table and stood.

"I didn't mean to give you attitude." He placed a hand on top of hers. "We just discussed this a week ago. I told you what I meant."

She sat back down.

"If my message isn't received, tell me what I need to say."

"I don't want to," she spoke to her plate, "date anyone else. But, I-I'm not sure…."

"Of what?"

"I'm not sure how serious." Her eyebrows pinched together. "I mean, I know you're not asking…. But, I'm not sure I'm ready to get married - as an example. And, I-I want to be sure we're on the same time table."

His princess was turning out to be 'complicated'. "This is enough for now."

"This? Food and kisses and working out?"

His heart knocked against his ribcage. "Well. No."

"Which part needs to change? Because, over the past few weeks," she waved her fork at the space between them. "This. Isn't enough for me, either."

"I can do more, for you, Relena." He returned to cutting his steak in a slowed-down version of eating.

"I want to go out places. Bring you with me to meet coworkers or friends."

Heero nodded. "I can do that."

"What about parents? Family?"

He straightened his shoulders and met her gaze. "Within mission parameters."

"Plus one at a wedding." She arched an eyebrow.

"Acceptable."

"All right. And although I'm sure I can guess." Her head tilted. "What's missing from your side?"

"Watching sports." He took a bite of green beans and chewed.

Her mouth opened and closed. "What?"

"Did you expect me to say 'sex', Relena?"

"Yes."

"You have a one track mind." He swallowed a smile.

"Me?" Red tinged her cheeks. "You're mister subtext."

"If sex is that important—"

"Ha ha, Mr. Yuy. Very clever."

"I'm a physical person." He placed his napkin on the table. "We started off working out together. I'd like that to continue."

"It's," she nodded, "on the table."

"I don't mean here. That's not what restaurants are for, Relena."

"You're absolutely awful sometimes! I mean!" She heaved a sigh. "You know what I mean."

He grinned. "You turn pink when you're angry."

"If there's nothing chocolate on the menu, you're taking me someplace else for dessert." Relena pointed at him. "And not my shower!"

* * *

The third course - returned to 'maddening'...

Heero pinned Relena beneath him on her couch - her breathy moans loosening ties on his strict discipline (courtesy of eight years in the Marine Corps). He kissed a path down her neck. Her fingers dug into the space between his shoulder blades. He pushed fabric out of the way to get to the soft skin of her breast.

Heero settled more of his weight into her.

"Ah, Heero…"

His name on her lips. Her hot breath against his ear. Heero laved his tongue over the peak of her breast. His left hand palmed the other and applied gentle pressure. She felt so good….

"H-Heero." She pushed against his shoulders. "Uhhhhhhhhhn. N-not yet. Please."

He closed his mouth to keep the deep sigh and pathetic whimper caged inside. Heero pushed himself into a sitting position.

"I-I…" Relena pulled her sweater down and sat up. She combed fingers through her hair.

"It's fine. Not on the first date." Heero stood up.

"It's not that. I mean it is, but. It's more than that."

"Ok." He set his jaw.

"I, uh, need to tell you something. A couple of something's. Actually." She folded her hands in her lap.

"Sure."

"I've had boyfriends before, and there have been," she twisted her fingers together. "But I...haven't exactly…."

Heero tried not to stare at her. No one, in her twenty-five years, had shared her bed? "Understood. If you'll trust me, we can take things slow."

"Okay. I trust you. More than anyone else. Which is why," she stood up, and took his hand into hers. "I want you to trust me, too."

He knew what she was going to say. The closed adoption search didn't yield much information - other than her birth mother's family name. And that Relena had been in contact with the family for around a decade.

"I don't know how to say this. B-but." She met his gaze. "My real name is Relena Peacecraft. Not." Her shoulders shrugged and her eyebrows lifted. "Not Darlian."

"I'm aware."

"You're what?"

"It's what I do for a living, Relena."

She dropped his hand and gaped at him. "That's more than an internet search, Heero."

"I wasn't kidding about my security clearance." He stuffed his hands in his pockets. "I research everyone who lives in our building."

"You know everyone—"

"I helped police find a missing kid and arrest a drug dealer. The leasing manager looks the other way when I stop in."

A sharp intake of breath. "So, you did a search before we met."

"I dug deeper afterwards. The DoD* will conduct an official investigation on all members of my household."

"So, you're saying." Relena blinked. "I'd have to pass a background check. Once we were, if we were," she frowned. "Serious."

A flash of anger burned through him. "This is 'serious', or I wouldn't bother."

"I. Well. From now on, if you want to know something, ask me. If there's a background check I need to pass, to be part of your life, I should at least know about it. Agreed?"

Heero nodded.

"So, then, you already know. That I was adopted. And about my family?"

"The name. Was there something else?"

"Well. No? Just." She sat back down on her couch. "The Peacecrafts happen to be a distant relation to the House of Glücksburg." Relena smoothed hands over her skirt. One thumb lingered on her inner thigh.

He wanted to find out how sensitive that flesh was.

"And, they can be a little intrusive. At times."

Sonofa- "House of Glücksburg? As in, you really are a princess."

She huffed and glared. "Nothing like that! Just. Very distantly related to a, uh, 'house of nobility'."

"You're a real princess." Heero shook his head. Of course she was. Because stuff like that happened in real life.

"I'm not! Everyone in Europe is related to nobility. Somewhere." Relena glanced in the direction of the painting on her wall. "But the Peacecrafts can act like I have some weird responsibilities. At times."

"Like knighting ceremonies? Dancing at balls until midnight?" He leaned over the side of the couch. "You have a pair of glass slippers, don't you?"

"You're impossible!" She stood up. "None of those things. But, I got a little frustrated with them in college. Always wanting to know where I was, who I was with. My grades."

Heero shook his head. The life of a princess. Wait. "You're in hiding."

"Only a little. Not a lot. Just. I don't want that life. I want my life."

He tilted his head and tried to picture which princess she'd be. Of course, his knowledge of the traditional fairy tale princesses was cursory at best: he kinda knew Cinderella; there was one with long hair. Wasn't there one that turned into an ogre? Yeah, he didn't fuckin' know.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Just trying to figure out what kind of fairy godmother sets you up with a Marine. She didn't read my resume: quarter Japanese mutt with no pedigree, no college, no prince charming certificate." He picked up his blazer. "The old lady's gone blind or batty."

Her face relaxed into a smile. "I fired her ages ago. I picked you on my own."

"I'm sure your house of nobility would object."

"Like I said. I don't want that life." She nibbled at his bottom lip, drawing him into a kiss. A light, slow connection….

The kiss broke. "They'll come looking."

"My brother will," she said with a sigh. "The rest of them, who knows? And I don't care what they think."

He took a deep breath. It wasn't the right time, but he may as well start target practice. "We should elope."

"What? You-you're kidding!" She twisted in his embrace. He tightened his hold.

"I'm not."

"I will throw you out again, Heero Yuy!" She broke away and took a step back.

"You were sending me home anyway. It's almost midnight. One of us is bound to turn into a pumpkin."

"I'm surprised you know that reference."

"Princess school entrance exams."

"Right." Relena walked him to the door. When she reached for the handle to let him out, he grabbed her hand and pulled her close. Heero seized her lips into a rough kiss. Her hands came up to his shoulders, then wound around his neck. He swept his tongue into her mouth.

After a long moment of trying not to pick her up and carry her off to her bedroom - the kiss broke. Her eyes fluttered open. Relena smiled; she met his gaze through heavy-looking eyelids. "Prince Charming doesn't kiss like that."

"He's doing it wrong."

"I agree. The Marine Corps has better technique."

"That's not the Corps."

"Oh no?" She drew her hand down the side of his cheek.

"We could still elope tonight."

She dropped her hand. "How?"

"I have ways. If that's a yes?"

"It'll take you more than one date, Yuy." She pushed him away.

"Tomorrow?"

"Go!" She opened the door. He stepped into the hallway, then turned and leaned down. She pecked his lips. "Good night, Heero. I had a wonderful time on our first date."

He nodded. "Good night, Relena."

Before letting himself into his apartment, Heero turned around. Relena's door clicked shut and he sighed.

'She really is a God damned princess.'

* * *

*DoD = US Department of Defense; it provides the military forces needed to deter war and ensure national security. And issues the vast majority (80%) of security clearances.


	7. Connection

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to those who will read it! And thanks for all the kind reviews you have left. It's very much appreciated. ^_^
> 
> Love,
> 
> ~Rose

Warning: Making out ensues. Consistent with an M rating.

Warning: PTSD flashbacks.

* * *

**"Connection." Was there a time when it wasn't so difficult?**

Not long after negotiating the terms of their relationship, Relena's friend Hilde invited the couple to join her and her new boyfriend for drinks. And a few rounds of pool.

Heero inwardly groaned at the invite, but tried to appear enthusiastic - or, at least like he hadn't just been quarter-decked*.

The restaurant and bar reminded Heero of a city's version of a honky tonk. Swirling carpet patterns attempted to disguise years of spilled food and beer - by the smell of the place. A sour blend of air freshener, antiseptic, and fried food hung in the air.

It wasn't the type of place Heero would take a princess, but she appeared happy enough to be there.

'I'll pass on the food.' Heero eyed the list of beers on tap. He couldn't help scouting the environment out of the corner of his eye.

Three guys in leather biker jackets hovered over a pool table on the far left. No name on the back; not gang members.

Five preppy kids played pool two tables over from the bikers. One smacked a waitress on the ass as she walked by. Another made a lewd gesture when she flipped them off.

The remaining game tables appeared unused. In the restaurant section, six groups of ordinary-looking people sat in restaurant booths - like Heero and his friends. No one stood out from the crowd.

Heero counted four waitresses working the restaurant floor and two covering the pool tables. Their "uniforms" looked less than uniform, but consisted of varying degrees of low-cut t-shirts and tight shorts. This explained why Duo liked the place. But not why he'd take his girlfriend.

"So, how'd you get him to come out of his fox hole?" Duo pointed the tip of his beer bottle in Heero's direction. He grinned.

"Duo." Hilde's voice sounded like a warning. The dark-haired girl jabbed an elbow into her boyfriend's rib cage. She mouthed: "sorry, Relena," across the table.

"It took quite a lot." Relena gave Heero a sidelong glance - a smile playing on her lips. His entire body reacted to that look.

"I bet."

"It didn't. I just asked him." She met his gaze; her hand found his under the table.

"He never says yes when I ask him!" Duo threw his hands in the air and shook his head.

"She's better looking."

Duo laughed. "Not gonna argue that." He raised his bottle in a small salute.

Heero relaxed into the cushion of the booth. Their table sat along the front wall of the restaurant. A large, picture frame window over his left shoulder looked out into the parking lot. At this time of day, the glass made for a better mirror than a window.

Their waitress brought his local brew IPA in a pint glass, and Relena's lager in a dark brown bottle. Heero grabbed his beer with his left hand and took a sip.

"Did he ever tell you what a daredevil he was in the Corps?"

Hilde leaned over and muttered something Heero didn't catch - near Duo's ear. It didn't matter, the gregarious oaf would do as he pleased. And what pleased his 'friend' most, involved trying to get under Heero's skin.

Like the annoying little brother he'd never wanted.

"Daredevil? I mean. I guess that's not too surprising, but you don't strike me as an adrenaline junkie, dear."

"I'm not."

"First out of the plane every time."

Hilde's head whipped around to stare at him. "Paratrooper?"

Heero took another sip of his pint and looked away. "Sometimes."

"We all were. Had to be." Duo placed an arm around his girlfriend's shoulder. "But this guy." A sly smile. "Did you tell her about the time your main chute didn't deploy?"

"No, Maxwell." Every muscle in his neck and shoulders hardened. He pulled his hand from Relena's grasp. "And I don't-"

"You're supposed to slow your ass down." Duo talked with his hands and his beer bottle. "Become as horizontal as you can - so you have time to deploy your reserve chute." Dark brown eyebrows drew into a frown above a wide grin. "But. Not this guy."

"What'd he do?" Hilde gasped. She stared at Heero like he was a fish in an aquarium.

"He beelines for the ground. Just takes some hard left turn at Albuquerque or some shit, and opens his reserve chute inches before hitting sixteen hundred feet. The whole squad figured we were just gonna find his carcass."  
  


_Wind whipped through him. Cold air thrashed at his goggles, his fatigues, his pack; it ripped down his back.  
  
_

"But, aside from a broken leg, dude was fine. Grumpier than shit, but. Too stubborn to die. Even finished the mission. If you can believe that."

Heero ignored the looks he could see in the reflection of the window. He took a deep breath and told his body to relax. 'It's just a story. It's in the past. Don't picture it. Don't remember.'  
  


_He fought a dark terror that made his whole body burn. No time. No time to panic. No time to feel._

_Focus._

_Focus or you're gonna fuckin' die!_

  
Relena's hand on his elbow. "Heero?"

He drew in a ragged breath. "I was repositioning."

"I. I'm just glad you're here." She leaned over to give him a kiss; he turned so that it landed on his cheek. She frowned.

"I needed a softer landing with the reserve chute, or, possibly, no chute." He tucked his hands under his thighs. "There was a marshy area three clicks North of our intended target."

"Don't let him fool you, princess. He's as hard core as they come."

"All right, well, I think you've told on him enough." Hilde's voice. The groan and squeal of movement across vinyl seats. "Let's go see if that old junker of a jukebox over there, works, lover boy."

Heero stared out the window and worked on finding his breath.

"Sounds good! I want to buy that thing. It looks awesome!" Duo's loud voice grated on Heero's eardrums.

Then, a little bit softer as they walked away: "I was trying to help. The girls can't take their panties off fast enough after a story like that."

"Duoooo." Hilde hugged his arm and giggled.

"Heh. It worked with you."

Relena placed a hand on Heero's arm. He tried not to jump out of his skin.

"What's wrong?" She peered up at him.

He glanced at her out of the side of his eye. "Nothing."

"Or maybe I should ask you how many girls have taken their panties off for you after that story."

Deep breath. Hold. Exhale. He shivered. When had the air turned so cold? "Not many."

"So, there have been some?" She fiddled with her napkin on top of the table. Bending one corner, then turning it to bend another.

"What do you want to know? The number of girlfriends? Whom I've slept with? Or, something else?"

"I just. I want to know more about you."

"Isn't it enough to know who I am, now?"

"It's a way that people connect, Heero. Sharing past experiences. I know you were shut away in the Marines for some time, but certainly, you haven't forgotten that?"

"And what past experiences could you and I have in common?"'

"A first date? A first love." She shrugged. "Graduation. A school dance?"

Heero pressed his eyes closed and willed his hands to stop shaking.

"Overbearing parents? Difficult siblings. Sports?" Relena grabbed his chin. His eyes snapped open.

"There have been a number of studies that demonstrate - what humans strive for, our needs - are remarkably similar across cultures and other boundaries. I don't see you and I as so different."

"You always have," Heero sighed, "so many words. I don't." He put his arm around her and kissed her forehead.

"Hm. We have ways of making you talk." Relena snuggled into his embrace. She warmed him.

"Does it involve removing your panties?"

"Ha ha. How about they won't come off until you talk."

"I've withstood greater tortures."

Loud, galloping punk rock music erupted from the overhead speakers. Heero glanced up. "They got the jukebox to work."  
  


"Until then, better off dead!

"A smile on the lips, and a hole in the head!" **  
  


"Good! I'll go check it out." She disentangled herself, gave him a quick kiss and hopped to her feet. Her warmth receded.

"Relena."

She spun back around. Eyes bright, she met his gaze and smiled. "Yes?"

"He'll tell you more stories about me. I wonder if that still counts as shared experiences." He met her gaze over the tilt of his pint glass.

She pursed her lips together and lifted an eyebrow.

"Let me know."

* * *

Relena moved towards the pool table Duo and Hilde rented. The punk song that his friend always looked for on a jukebox - no one knew why - finished playing.

He watched the trio of friends from across the restaurant. He knew they wouldn't necessarily talk about him….

But, the beer started to taste warm. Duo and Relena broke away - to hover near the jukebox. The table of preppy guys encroached on Hilde.

'Time to move.'

Heero stood from the table and crossed the dining area to the game room. He took up a position at the end of the pool table, and shot his worst glare at the guys hitting on Hilde. Three of them wandered back to their game.

Heero crossed his arms and sat back against the felt table. Since Duo and Relena stood, three-quarter turned his direction, Heero had a decent view of their faces. And happened to be an excellent lip reader.

"...difficult one to get to know."

"It's been a process. Every other guy I've met, who was interested, managed to ask me out within the first couple of weeks of our acquaintance." She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "Heero took? Hm, three months? Of being casual workout buddies," she raised a finger and shot Duo a look, "not in that sense. And me being so incredibly obvious."

The former Marine with the long braid shook his head and took a sip of his beer.

"I cooked him dinner in his apartment on a Friday night. Still, nothing."

Heero smiled. 'Not nothing. I got the hint.'

"He's cautious. And has reasons for everything he does." Duo's beer hovered over his lips, and Heero missed some of what he said.

"...analysis has, at times, bordered on obsession. He's damned good at anything he wants to be good at."

"I can see that."

'Don't say: except for relationships, or I will beat you."

"And the kind of sonofabitch who'd lay his life down for ya. For all the wrong reasons. A damned good brother - in the Marine sense."

Her mouth curved up, but it didn't reach her eyes. "I can see that, too."

"No, you don't get it." Duo put his beer down on top of the juke box as he leaned into her personal space.

"Great Marine, lousy friend. A real shit."

'This is his idea of good behavior.' Heero stood and started his approach.

Relena shook her head. "You care more…" she turned away.

"You're going to have to be tenacious."

"Like you?"

"Damned right."

Heero paused - within earshot, now.

"He's got a kindness." Relena spoke to the jukebox; her fingers splayed over the plexiglass dome. Her tone sounded soft. Wistful.

Heero moved behind Duo.

"Even when he griped at me to be cautious about people….I could tell. He meant. He meant to care for me." She shook her head and tossed her hair over one shoulder as she glanced up. "I won't pretend he's an easy one to deal with all the time. But. Something in me feels like...He's worth it."

Air squeezed from his lungs, and his head felt light.

"Glad somebody thinks so."

Heero grabbed Duo's shoulder; he drilled his fingers into the trapezius muscle at the base of his friend's neck. "You should've been able to tell I was standing here."

"Ow! Shit! That fuckin' hurts, jackass." Duo whirled around.

"Good. Hilde's been alone for five minutes and already has other guys hitting on her. You'd better go."

"Oh, this'll be fun." Duo made a fist and cracked his knuckles.

"Don't stir up trouble, dick." Heero called out after him. "I won't back you up this time."

"Yeah, right. That's what you said last time, too." He bounded off in the direction of the pool tables.

"I meant it then!" He grumbled at Relena. "This is why I say 'no', when he asks."

"Stealth and blending in. You're still a stalker."

"Find out what you needed to know?"

"I already knew everything I needed to. Did you discover something interesting?" She tilted her head and looked up at him. Aquamarine eyes glittered in the dim lighting.

"Nothing I didn't already know."

"I'd need the skills of a super spy to surprise you, wouldn't I?" She leaned closer; he liked the way she fit against him.

"Hn."

"Anything else?"

Heero shrugged. "I thought this was about shared life experiences, not my many flaws."

She moved to face him. "Have you," Relena trailed her fingers from his elbows to grasp his hands, "let yourself experience, life? I get the feeling that you watch, wait, even calculate. But the times you're 'in the moment' are few and far between…" His girlfriend appeared to study him.

"How about we play the game with our friends?"

"Now who's avoiding?"

He brought his hand up to her cheek. "I was answering the question, Relena." He wrapped his arm around her waist. Her citrusy cinnamon scent drifted up and caught his attention.

'I don't always have the words. But, you're worth it, to me, too.'

"Then," she murmured. Her palms came to rest on his chest. "What you're saying is. I may or may not be correct, but," she met his gaze. A tender smile. Her soothing warmth.

"Right now, you want to," her breath hitched. "Be here. With me and our friends?" Relena's eyes drifted closed.

Heero covered her mouth with his.

* * *

Later that evening:

Heero walked her to her door; her hand tucked between his elbow and ribcage. A comfortable quiet had settled between them during the drive back to their apartment building. Comfortable, except for wanting to touch her. In that perfect, bare space between the top of her knee and the bottom of her skirt.

She looked up at him, her back to her apartment door. "Come in? And talk?" Relena's eyelashes formed a seductive-looking fringe around her eyes.

He leaned close. "Just talk?"

"Just talk." She gave him a sidelong glance with a half smile. Her complexion flushed and her eyes sparkled.

"Sure." He stifled the groan that wouldn't earn him any Prince Charming points. 'How long will she make me wait?'

She closed the door and started towards the kitchen. "Coffee?"

"No thanks. Water's fine." He sat down. Relena placed a water bottle on the coffee table and sat next to him. She settled her head on his shoulder.

"You seemed a little distant. Tonight? Your friend's story bothered you."

The muscles in his neck stiffened. "Hn."

"You know, your past," she tilted her head to look up at him. "It's up to you. I'm here, and I care, but it doesn't change anything."

He nodded, and escaped by leaning forward to grab the bottle of water. "Why the picture?" He sipped the water.

"The painting? It's Mother Denmark. A reproduction, of course."

"A nod to your heritage."

"My brother," she said with a sigh. "Well, half-brother. Did you…."

'Don't ask.'

She soothed her fingers through the hair on the back of his head. "You don't talk about your family."

He pressed his eyes closed and focused on her ministrations. Tiny shivers coursed through the muscles of his back. "Don't have one. Just the Corps."

Her fingers paused. "Heero?" She pulled on his chin.

"Don't."

Relena kissed him, then. Her mouth, at first, sweetness and syrup. She drew him in. The tension seeped from his muscles, and oozed from his pores. He broke away, took a breath, and renewed the fervor of their kiss. Hungry, she devoured his lips. He slipped his tongue into her mouth.

That heated haze began to unfurl - growing, longing. It nudged his heart rate up to a sprint. Heero wrapped an arm around Relena's waist, and pulled her into his lap. Her heated gaze held his. Gentle fingers stroked the side of his face.

She smiled. Tenderness lit her eyes. Part of him wanted to live, in that look, to have her always look at him that way. But the unfurling heat; it wanted to bite and suck it off her features - until she could only stare at him with pulsing, raging desire. His stomach flipped over; he maneuvered her down onto the couch.

He kissed her again, deep and slow - feeling the warmth of her arms around him. The sweet agony of her, pliant and affected beneath him.

Heero broke the kiss. "You just wanted to talk."

"You're complaining?"

"No." He leaned down, into her - kissing her neck; licking and sucking available flesh. A soft moan escaped her lips. Heero ran his hand over her stomach to her ribcage. His thumb stroked the curve of her breast.

"Just. Be honest," he breathed against her cheek. "I won't go too far." Heero brushed his fingers over the peak of her chest. He found the nipple and rubbed circles into the light fabric of her bra. It tightened into a pebble; he wanted to find it with his teeth.

"I'm not—" She took a seething breath. Heero stilled.

"Not yet. I'm. I'm sorry."

"It's alright." He bit a harsh kiss into her neck and sat up. "I'll get those panties off you someday."

"Heero!" She bolted upright, adjusting her bra beneath her sweater. She appeared a bit dazed. Her hair mussed; lipstick smeared. Relena ran a finger over the side of her mouth.

He wanted to lick the rest of her makeup off.

"I should go." He stood, and covertly adjusted that aching part of his anatomy.

"Hmmmmm?"

He glanced back at her. He felt rough and raw, and his body hurt. She glowed.

"I guess you should. But, I had a nice time. With you." Her gaze locked with his. Blue-green eyes glittered.

"Thanks for the talk."

"Ha ha." She rose from the couch and leaned into him. "Maybe if you talked a bit more, I wouldn't have to resort to such tactics."

"I'll never say another word."

She raised an eyebrow. "Sounds like a challenge."

"It is." He pulled her into a loose embrace.

Relena rolled her eyes before settling her head on his chest.

"But, you should know. I've been through SERE training."

"SERE?"

"Survival, Evasion, Resistance - to interrogation - and Escape."

She stepped back, out of the circle of his arms. "I have no doubt," her tone sobered. "You could evade, resist, or escape, if you chose. And, you'd survive just fine."

Heero straightened his shoulders. 'What is she saying?'

"But, I wonder if survival is enough."

An invisible hand grabbed him around his ribcage and squeezed. Hard. He turned away. Opened the door.

"Heero?" Her voice caught him around the throat. He tried to swallow and couldn't.

Heero leaned his forehead against the edge of the door. Could he leave and not answer? Would she accept that?

Something within him said she wouldn't. That walking away meant he ceased trying. And once he stopped - whether she stayed a day, a month, or a year longer, it didn't matter. The end result would be the same.

He gripped the doorknob, stood his ground and gave it everything he had. "It's not. Anymore."

Heero ducked his head, and stepped into the hall. He shut the door behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *In the Marine Corps and Coast Guard basic training, the quarter-deck is a special place in the barracks where you're sent to do an amazing amount of physical exercises, all under the direct supervision and encouragement of a drill instructor.
> 
> **Lyrics from the Bad Religion song: [ Better off Dead](https://badreligion.com/albums/stranger-than-fiction)


End file.
